In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

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While
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some argue that there are benefits of living with their family during university
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whereas
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apply
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others believe that living away from
home
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with their family
while
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they study
outweigh
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outweighs
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the disadvantages ,
this
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essay will examine both perspectives before presenting my view. It is
undoubtely
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undoubtedly
true that staying under the same roof as your family makes you feel more protected and focus-driven to study and concentrate more, as of my own personal experience I could not but agree to
this
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more because most of my tasks which
is
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are
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not study related has already been done for me like cooking, cleaning, laundry
ectera
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etcetera
extra
.... and whenever I feel unmotivated or
discourged
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discouraged
at school I know I could back
back
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apply
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to a place where I am not being judged .
Thus
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staying
home
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with our clan may have advantages.
On the other
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hand
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hand,
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moving away from
home
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also
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has its benefits too, now that I am currently living away from
home
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and pursuing my studies in a different country, I agree that staying by myself has exposed and forced me to learn more, it
maybe
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may be
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the chores that I have to do for myself or to go the bank on a school evening.
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Also
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I cannot disagree
to
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with
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the fact that I get my own independence and get to deal with my finances .
Therefore
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living away from
home
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outweigh
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outweighs
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its
disadvantges
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disadvantages
. In
conclusion
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conclusion,
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while
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there are pros and cons in each scenario, my personal opinion is that students should get to live
in
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on
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their own terms and be responsible
to
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for
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their own
sucess
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success
and failures and to know how to deal with consequences when it is the latter and own them , In the
end
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end,
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it is very important that everyone realizes that "failure is the stepping stone of
sucess
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success
" because living with our group we might tend to ignore the difficulties as we know in the back of our mind that someone will always take care of our issues.

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clarity
Consider rephrasing the introduction to clarify that you are presenting your view alongside examining both perspectives. It can help outline your essay better.
structure
Review your paragraphs for clearer topic sentences that encapsulate the main idea of each paragraph. This will aid in improving the logical flow of ideas.
grammar
There are some minor grammatical errors. Carefully proofread your work to correct these, such as 'undoubtely' to 'undoubtedly' and 'ectera' to 'etc.'
examples
Include more specific examples or anecdotes to strengthen your argument and make your points more relatable to the reader.
content
You presented both sides of the argument, showing good awareness of the topic and a balanced approach.
final thoughts
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and reflects on the journey of learning, which is a positive note to end on.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
What to do next:
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