IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people think that the increasing use of computer and mobile phones nowadays has unwanted effects on the young people reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Nowadays there is no doubt
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young people
aducted
Correct your spelling
addicted
 to
use
Wrong verb form
using
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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computer and mobile
Use synonyms
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
, Do you
thing
Correct your spelling
think
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 it is will fix
this
Linking Words
issus
Correct your spelling
issue
 in future , In
this
Linking Words
 essay I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using it . First of
all
Add a comma
all,
show examples
 I will start by looking at the benefits
in
Change preposition
apply
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these days
it
Correct pronoun usage
we
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 cannot give up using
Add an article
a computer
the computer
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computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
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 and
mobile
Add an article
the mobile
show examples
Use synonyms
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 because we
in
Add a missing verb
are in
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 a
diffirente
Correct your spelling
different
 generation
Correct word choice
and everythings
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everythings
Correct your spelling
everything
 you can do in it
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
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reading , writing , all over
skills
Correct article usage
the skills
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 of
adications
Correct your spelling
medications
.
Moreover
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 it
easier
Add a missing verb
is easier
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 to carry
laptop
Correct article usage
a laptop
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 or
phone
Use synonyms
 wherever you want to go and practice your reading and writing as well . On
other
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
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hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 there
is
Change the verb form
are
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also
Linking Words
 cons
Correct your spelling
assessed
asseseted
Correct your spelling
assessed
Change preposition
with
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by
Change preposition
with
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 using
Use synonyms
phone
Add an article
a phone
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 rather than
Correct article usage
a real
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real
Correct article usage
a real
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 book
such
Linking Words
 as being distracted
Correct your spelling
easily
essaly
Correct your spelling
easily
.
Furthrmore
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Furthermore
 using
ben
Capitalize word
Ben
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 and
pepper
Capitalize word
Pepper
show examples
 have
special
Correct article usage
a special
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 feel
in
Change preposition
for
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 your skills
while
Linking Words
 you read or write . 
To conclude
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with
Change preposition
apply
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, the
binifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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outwieght
Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighed
 the drawbacks I
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
mobile phones and
compeoters
Correct your spelling
competitors
 have encouraged young people
for
Change preposition
to
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 study essaly and clearly ,
Moreover
Linking Words
 we must ensure steps are taken to prevent
phenomenon
Add an article
the phenomenon
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 from
deteriorative
Correct article usage
a deteriorative
show examples
 future .

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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly states your view on the topic and preview your main points succinctly.
coherence and cohesion
Try to develop your ideas in a clearer way, making logical connections between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your arguments; this would strengthen your essay significantly.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to spelling and grammar; improving these will enhance the clarity of your writing.
task achievement
You've made an effort to explore both sides of the argument, showcasing your understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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