IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

One of the best ways to solve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Pollution
Use synonyms
 is becoming a huge problematic issue with the passage of time
due to
Linking Words
 development in technology,
however
Linking Words
 increasing the prices of
transportation
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 is not
only
Correct article usage
the only
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 as much effective way to reduce the harmful smoke; afforestation, using electric
vehicles
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,
less
Correct word choice
and less
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use
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private
Change preposition
of private
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vehicles
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 are considered more beneficial to eradicate the issue.
To begin
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 with, rapid growth in the buying cost of fuel motor
vehicles
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 disproportionately
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increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 inflation in the nation rather than
to avoid
Change the verb form
avoiding
show examples
 its
use
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. To clarify
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, tertiary market trends always depend on each other,
as
Correct word choice
apply
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if one product
will be
Wrong verb form
is
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 expensive
than
Correct your spelling
then
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 all other
commodities
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commodities'
commodity's
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 prices automatically
increase
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, which makes it difficult for common people to afford the daily livelihood expenses.
Therefore
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, it is best to replace
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel
vehicles
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to
Change preposition
with
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 electric ones, by which there would be
reduction
Add an article
a reduction
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 in air
pollution
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 and less
use
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 of natural resources,
Furthermore
Linking Words
, other strategies
such
Linking Words
 as afforestation and more
use
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 of public
transportation
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 are
also
Linking Words
 beneficial
Change preposition
to at
show examples
at
Correct your spelling
a
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 large extent
to make
Change preposition
in making
show examples
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 clean. it is true that planting more trees not higher the oxygen value in
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
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carbon
Correct article usage
the carbon
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 dioxide by which air
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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purify
Wrong verb form
purified
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.
Also
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,
government
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the government
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 should invest
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 public
transportation
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 because if buses and trains provide good facilities people will start to avoid their own
vehicles
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 to commute.
For instance
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, During the year of 2020, In India, the prime minister of Delhi
impose
Wrong verb form
imposed
show examples
 the rule of odd and even number cars, as one day either odd cars can run or with even number plates, in order to reduce
pollution
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 which directly
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increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 the utilization of public
transportation
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 since people do not have another option. In conclusion,
although
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 it
an
Add a missing verb
is an
show examples
 option to
increase
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 the prices of fuel motor
vehicles
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, other solutions
such
Linking Words
 as planting more trees
,
Correct word choice
and, increase
show examples
Use synonyms
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
 in public
transportation
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 would be more helpful in
eradicate
Change the form of the verb
eradicating
show examples
 the problem of
pollution
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea that is directly related to the overall topic.
task achievement
Try to provide more accurate examples or evidence to support your main points clearly and effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure correct punctuation and capitalization throughout your essay to enhance clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
Your essay presents a relevant counterargument and suggests alternative solutions to the environmental problem, which shows critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
You have provided a good structure with a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important for readability.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental problems
  • air pollution
  • traffic congestion
  • eco-friendly
  • fuel-efficient
  • carbon emissions
  • alternative modes of transportation
  • low-income families
  • subsidies
  • renewable energy projects
  • sustainability
  • incentivize
  • automotive industry
  • public transport
  • active lifestyle
What to do next:
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