IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays,many people choose to be self-employed,rather than to work for a company or organisation.why might this be the case?what could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

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These days, a large number of
people
Use synonyms
 becomes to choose to be self-employed, rather than
work
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 as an employee. I will explain the reasons and disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 trend. There are some reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 working
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their own
company
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.
To begin
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 with, employers can decide their working hours and can control their workload by themselves. Employees have to start their job at a time
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 their employer
decide
Correct subject-verb agreement
decides
show examples
,
whereas
Linking Words
 employer can start their
work
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 when they want.
Similarly
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, Employees have to finish their assigned
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
 within working hours,
while
Linking Words
 those who are self-employed can control the amount of their
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
. Another reason is that starting
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
company
Use synonyms
 today is much easier than that in the past. Using
PC
Correct article usage
a PC
show examples
 or smartphone,
people
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 can start their own
company
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 easily.
Moreover
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, some
people
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 don’t want to
work
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 with other
people
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 because they dislike to communicate with others.
In contrast
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, negative aspects are shown in
this
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 trend.
Most
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A most
The most
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 serious problem is their unstable income.
Although
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 large companies can provide their employees with constant salaries, small companies
such
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 as
self employed
Add a hyphen
self-employed
show examples
Use synonyms
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 can not earn stable profits.
Additionally
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,
this
Linking Words
 working style is difficult to get
credits
Fix the agreement mistake
credit
show examples
 from other
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
.
For example
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, renting
a
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apply
show examples
housing or purchasing a car,
people
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 who
work
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 by themselves may not make
loan
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loans
show examples
 with long durations of payments.
This
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 is because
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is difficult for them to prove their stable incomes. In conclusion,
people
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 tend to choose to be self-employed because of their working style and easiness of entrepreneurship. The disadvantages of the trends come from the difficulty
to get
Change preposition
of getting
show examples
 constant income and reliance
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their
work
Use synonyms
.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, but the ideas could be organized more logically with clearer topic sentences for each paragraph.
Task Achievement
Try to elaborate on the reasons and disadvantages you mention. Adding more specific examples can strengthen your arguments.
Task Achievement
You have addressed the task and provided some relevant reasons and disadvantages of being self-employed.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employment
  • freelancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • autonomy
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • financial insecurity
  • lack of support
  • resources
  • long working hours
  • uncertain income
  • job security
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