IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Forests are the lungs of the earth. Destructions of the world forest can result in death of the world we currently know. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is an undeniable fact that
forest
Fix the agreement mistake
forests
show examples
 are the lungs of the earth.
Forests
Use synonyms
 play a crucial role in maintaining
balanced
Correct article usage
a balanced
show examples
 life on
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
. The reason why it
called
Add a missing verb
is called
show examples
 ‘Lungs of the Earth’ is because of its ability to absorb CO2 and release Oxygen. I strongly agree with the statement that
destruction
Correct article usage
the destruction
show examples
 of
forests
Use synonyms
 can result in
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
 of the world
Firstly
Linking Words
, Deforestation leads to several problems
such
Linking Words
 as
destruction
Correct article usage
the destruction
show examples
 of wildlife.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 increases the effect of global
warning
Correct your spelling
warming
show examples
, cutting down trees
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
disturbing
Wrong verb form
disturbs
show examples
 the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 of animals and many
spices
Correct your spelling
species
show examples
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Asia
has been
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 disappeared since there is no place for them to stay in the forest. Tress absorbs Carbon Dioxide and removal of that increases the problems of rising sea levels, Polluted air and uncertain weather conditions.
For instance
Linking Words
, Gir National Park
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 in Gujarat, India. Where most of the ancient species of Lions were found are now facing
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 decline in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of lions because of deforestation.
Secondly
Linking Words
, some species of plants and animals are
also
Linking Words
 extinct from the
forests
Use synonyms
 of the world because of
Correct article usage
the destructions
show examples
destructions
Fix the agreement mistake
destruction
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in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the worlds forest
Change to a genitive case
the world's forest
the forest of the world
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 medicines are
also
Linking Words
 unavailable which are made from the plants of the
forests
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I seldom consider the other side of the argument. Some people
also
Linking Words
 argue that deforestation is necessary for
Add an article
the economical
show examples
economical
Replace the word
economic
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 growth of the country,
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
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 industries like agriculture and Real estate
believes
Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
show examples
 that we should use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
forests
Use synonyms
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human growth, but
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should take
actions
Fix the agreement mistake
action
show examples
 and must think about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reforestation, so it causes less harm to the environment. In a Nutshell, I strongly agree with
reforestation
Correct article usage
the reforestation
show examples
 concept and people should
also
Linking Words
 support it to save the earth
otherwise
Linking Words
 the world we currently know will become a difficult place to live for future
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
show examples
.

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Task Achievement
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your main argument, and consider providing one more example or point to further solidify your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Check for grammatical accuracy and revise for smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance flow.
Task Achievement
You have effectively communicated the importance of forests and the impact of deforestation, showcasing a clear stance on the topic.
Task Achievement
Your use of specific examples, like Gir National Park, helps to illustrate your points, making your argument more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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