IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The world needs an organization to create laws that would be the same everywhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is said that
,
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apply
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 there should be
legistical
Correct your spelling
logistical
 bodies
that
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is
Change the verb form
are
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 constant around the universe. I completely agree with
this
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 statement, as implementing identical rules can undo the
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
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 between people thereby, providing harmony and peace to everyone around the globe. Nowadays, there are different rules and regulations for each part of the country.
This
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 can be difficult for foreign travellers to navigate and understand better. Providing rules that appear to be similar in style and method can reduce the difference among the crowd.
For example
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, UNISECO is
such
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a
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an
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instituion
Correct your spelling
institution
 that
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 similar
regulation
Fix the agreement mistake
regulations
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 for a number of
countries
Use synonyms
. It is a partnership made by
countries
Use synonyms
 around different
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of the earth, so that every
citizens
Change to a singular noun
citizen
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 is respected and is informed about new policies and regulations. To add on, executing ideal order can be challenging
some times
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sometimes
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. As
,
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apply
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 there is war and fight around neighbouring territories and states. Administrating uniform law can disclose
this
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 rage among
community
Add an article
the community
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 to produce
treaty
Correct article usage
a treaty
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 and resolution.The corporation
among
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between
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
India and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Pakistan can be a great sample to support the view. These
countries
Use synonyms
 are past enemies of one another yet, when participating together in universal
sport
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sports
show examples
 activities or
meeting
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meetings
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 they appear to be well-mannered and
disiciplined
Correct your spelling
disciplined
 to each other. It is because both nations are associated with
World
Correct article usage
the World
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 Peace Association conference to
upheld
Wrong verb form
uphold
show examples
this
Linking Words
probem
Correct your spelling
problem
 among them.
To conclude
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, It is stated that
countries
Use synonyms
 need a corporational body that would provide ideal law around the world. I completely agree with the viewpoint. Since it can lessen the contrast among people and
hence
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,
providing
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
 peace and euphony.

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task achievement
Your essay presents a relevant response to the task, but further development of your ideas is needed to enhance clarity. Be sure to expand on how a universal legal system could specifically improve situations and provide concrete examples.
coherence and cohesion
The organization of your essay is generally clear, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Consider using connecting phrases to ensure that your points flow logically from one to another.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction clearly states your agreement with the statement, but including a brief outline of your main arguments could guide the reader more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that detract from the overall clarity of your argument. Proofreading your essay for grammatical accuracy and clarity of expression would be beneficial.
task achievement
You have a strong stance on the topic, demonstrating clear agreement, which is essential for persuasiveness.
task achievement
Your examples of organizations like UNISECO provide some relevant context, showing an understanding of international cooperation.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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