Some people think that young people should spend more of their free time at home with their families, and spend less time entertaining outside. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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The new generation of workers

believe

Change the verb form

believes

show examples

that change organisations are better at developing themselves by

including

Verb problem

apply

show examples

rapidly increasing the amount of salary.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some people still trust that working in the same place for a long time is more effective in part of the enhancement way unless, they have significant problems to be moved out

such

Linking Words

as parents' sickness, watching children, or married life.

Firstly

Linking Words

, there are a lot of benefits from changing organisations

for example

Linking Words

, gaining faster income and position compared with staying in the same company, meeting with new office culture and friends, or learning to job in a different industry which are the main reasons to decide resignation on currently work.

However

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

has negative sides from

this

Linking Words

concept like overstepping through either money or job position which causes one to

unprepared

Add a missing verb

be unprepared

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both

Change preposition

for both

show examples

knowledge and experience or will not find a suitable place

due to

Linking Words

changing work too often. By the way, those disadvantage results make some people concerned and start to do

this

Linking Words

organisation longer than before.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

opinion

also

Linking Words

has positive sides ,

for instance

Linking Words

, better relationships with boss, colleagues, or

partner

Fix the agreement mistake

partners

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deep

Correct article usage

a deep

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understanding of the industry, or hugely increasing

bonus

Fix the agreement mistake

bonuses

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each year.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

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these kinds of

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

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Verb problem

apply

show examples

a specialist

worker

Fix the agreement mistake

workers

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in each type of business , if they work in another business, they will be suddenly a newcomer to

this

Linking Words

town. In conclusion, both views have different advantages and disadvantages

outcome

Fix the agreement mistake

outcomes

show examples

which might extremely impact or lightly affect each body.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, you need to find the most efficient and suitable way belong you and get the most effectiveness in terms of improvement and income.

majorbreakersTue Apr 01 2025

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structure

The introduction and conclusion could be clearer and more focused. Ensure that the introduction outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay and that the conclusion effectively summarizes those points.

coherence

Improve the logical flow of your arguments. Work on making the connections between ideas clearer, as some sentences feel disconnected. This will enhance the overall plan of the essay.

task achievement

Include specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments and illustrate your ideas more effectively, making them more relatable to the reader.

language

Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to enhance clarity. Some sentences are a bit convoluted, making it challenging for readers to follow your argument.

content

You demonstrate an ability to discuss both views regarding job changes, showing awareness of different perspectives.

content

You provide some insightful points about the pros and cons of changing organizations versus staying with one, highlighting important aspects of both viewpoints.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

bond
nurture
meaningful
connection
independence
decision-making skills
well-rounded
personal preferences

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Some people think that young people should spend more of their free time at home with their families, and spend less time entertaining outside. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student's performance. Continual assessment, such as course work and projects, is not a satisfactory way to do this. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook, Twitter and so on) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government should invest more money in teaching science than other subjects for the progress of the country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more children are accessing the Internet unsupervised and at younger age. This can sometimes put them at risk. What problems do you think parents face when dealing with their children using the Internet?