IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

some people prefer to plan activities for their free time very carefully, whereas others think that it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is often argued by some people that they like to plan ahead their leisure
activities
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 very carefully,
while
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 others believe that they are just wasting their
time
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.
This
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 essay will discuss both views. Personally, I favour the former notion. To commence with, planning
activities
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 in their vacant
time
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 helps them to organise their
time
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 in an efficient way. To explain it,
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while
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apply
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they can enjoy their vacation without worrying about other
things
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.
Moreover
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, organising
prevent
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prevents
show examples
 mistakes and
things
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 are done in a systematic way.
For instance
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, every year people book
camp sites
Correct your spelling
campsites
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 in advance so that they can visit them without any hustle.
Thus
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, it indicates that planning is a very crucial step for
activities
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. Some individuals love to do
things
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 which are spontaneous and unplanned.
In other words
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,
indiviuals
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individuals
 do not want any
unnecesary
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unnecessary
 pressure like booking
hotel
Correct article usage
a hotel
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 or planning trips, they live in the moment and
random
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do random
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activities
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 to pass their
time
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. To cite an example, many people love to
do
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go
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 fishing every weekend.
As a result
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, they have already a routine to follow which makes them happy.
To conclude
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, my inclination
fall
Correct subject-verb agreement
falls
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 towards planning carefully because it
save
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saves
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 their
time
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 during their vacation period and
help
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helps
show examples
 them to enjoy
things
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stress free
Add a hyphen
stress-free
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. But do
activities
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according to
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 their mood when aid them
to live
Change preposition
in living
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 in that moment.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and the two opposing views, which is great. However, it could be enhanced by explicitly stating your own position in the thesis statement rather than just saying 'I favour the former notion.' A stronger thesis would clarify your stance more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
In the body paragraphs, try to use topic sentences that more clearly introduce the main idea of each paragraph. For instance, start the second paragraph with a clear statement about the appeal of spontaneous activities. This will improve the logical flow of your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
There are a few grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'organising prevent mistakes' (should be 'organizing prevents mistakes') and 'indiviuals' (should be 'individuals'). Ensure to proofread your work for such errors, as they can affect clarity.
task achievement
While you included examples, ensure they are as relevant and specific as possible. For instance, discussing a popular spontaneous activity and its impact on individuals would strengthen your argument.
task achievement
You successfully present both sides of the argument and provide some examples to support your points, showcasing a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, moving from the introduction to body paragraphs and concluding with a summary of your viewpoint, which aids readability.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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