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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that the intemet is increasing the gap between the rich and poor, while others argue that it helps to reduce this gap. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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The
internet
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 has revolutionized many aspects of modern life, including communication, education, and business.
However
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, there is an ongoing debate about whether it is increasing the
gap
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 between the rich and the poor or helping to bridge
this
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 divide.
While
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 some argue that the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 benefits only the wealthy, others believe it provides
opportunities
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 for everyone, regardless of economic status.
This
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 essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own opinion. On the one hand, many
people
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 argue that the
internet
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 widens the economic
gap
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 because
access
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 to technology is not equal. Wealthy individuals can afford high-speed
internet
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, expensive gadgets, and advanced digital skills, allowing them to take advantage of online education, remote jobs, and business
opportunities
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.
In contrast
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, poorer individuals, especially in developing countries, may struggle with limited
internet
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access
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 and lack the resources to benefit from digital advancements.
For instance
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, many rural areas still lack stable
internet
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 connections, making it difficult for residents to
access
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 online learning or job markets.
As a result
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, the wealth
gap
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 continues to grow as the rich gain more knowledge and
opportunities
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while
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 the poor are left behind.
On the other hand
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, supporters of the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 as an equalizer argue that it provides affordable
opportunities
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 for education, entrepreneurship, and employment. Free online courses, remote work, and e-commerce platforms have enabled many
people
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 from disadvantaged backgrounds to improve their financial situation.
For example
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, freelancers from developing nations can now work for international clients without needing to relocate,
while
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 small businesses can sell their products online without the need for a physical store.
This
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 accessibility helps bridge the wealth
gap
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 by allowing
people
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 from different economic backgrounds to gain skills and earn a living through the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. In my opinion,
while
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 the
internet
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 has the potential to reduce inequality, it depends on how it is used and who has
access
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 to it. Governments and organizations should work to improve
internet
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 accessibility in underprivileged areas, provide digital literacy programs, and ensure fair
opportunities
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 for everyone. When used correctly, the
internet
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 can be a powerful tool for economic empowerment rather than a factor that deepens the divide between the rich and poor. In conclusion, the
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 can both widen and reduce the
gap
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 between the wealthy and the poor.
While
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 it offers numerous
opportunities
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, limited
access
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 and digital illiteracy prevent some
people
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 from benefiting from it.
Therefore
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, efforts should be made to ensure equal
access
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 to technology so that everyone can take advantage of the benefits the
Use synonyms
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 has to offer

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Introduction
The introduction effectively sets the context and presents the topic clearly. You might consider rephrasing your thesis statement to make it even clearer that you will discuss both views and provide your opinion.
Coherence
The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphs. However, you can enhance transitions between ideas to improve flow, especially between the second and third paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Your arguments are relevant and comprehensive. Providing one or two more specific examples could strengthen your points further, especially in the section addressing the internet as an equalizer.
Content
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument effectively, which is crucial for this type of task.
Task Achievement
You provide a clear opinion at the end, which ties together the discussion well and reinforces the essay's purpose.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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