IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Your English-speaking friend has asked for your help with a college project he/she is doing about celebrating New Year in different countries. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Say how important New Year is to people in your country Describe how New Year is celebrated in your country Explain what you like about New Year celebrations in your country

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Dear Monika, I am writing
this
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 letter to explain about the New
Year
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 celebration in my country. I am glad to help you with your project, and I found
this
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 subject very interesting. I belong to the state of Gujarat, India. We celebrate the Gujarati New
Year
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, which comes on the next
day
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 of Diwali.
This
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day
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 is very crucial in my surroundings as we believe it is a new beginning of life. On the
day
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 of the New
Year
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, all people in the state wear new clothes. We start our
day
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 by going to the temple to do prayers. After that, we meet our family, friends, and relatives and seek blessings from our elders. We buy sweets and gifts for our loved ones and
also
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 invite them for lunch or dinner. I love
this
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 celebration a lot, as on
this
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day
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 I get a chance to spend quality time with my favourite people. Not only
this
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, but
also
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 I am the youngest in my whole family, and I receive many gifts on
this
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day
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.
However
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, after moving to Canada, I feel so alone on
this
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day
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 but hopefully next
year
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 I am planning to visit India to celebrate New
Year
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 with my family. Yours sincerely, Anamika

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task achievement
Try to introduce a bit more detail about specific customs or traditional foods associated with the celebration to enhance the richness of your response.
coherence and cohesion
Consider adding transitions between your points for smoother flow. For example, using 'Moreover' or 'Furthermore' would connect your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
In your closing, you might express your hope for Monika’s project and a warm wish for her New Year celebrations to strengthen your connection.
task achievement
Your enthusiasm for the New Year celebration shines through your writing, and it effectively communicates the significance of the occasion.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your letter is clear, and you have included a proper greeting and closing, which is great for letter writing.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • significant
  • reflection
  • goals
  • loved ones
  • fireworks
  • gatherings
  • traditions
  • public events
  • religious ceremonies
  • festive atmosphere
  • reconnect
  • exchanging gifts
  • resolutions
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