IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In the last decade, there has been a great increase in global air travel. What do you think are the reasons for this and do you think it is a good thing

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During the
last
Linking Words
 ten years, the number of global flights has
sky rocketed
Correct your spelling
skyrocketed
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. A
lot
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 of factors can be linked to
this
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 phenomenon. In my opinion,
this
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 situation has caused a variety of problems in different sectors.
Air
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travel
Use synonyms
 has experienced a huge increase that can be explained through a
lot
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 of reasons.
Firstly
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, globalisation made
travel
Use synonyms
 to another country more
appeling
Correct your spelling
appealing
 by connecting people around the world;
consequently
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, making them more
intrested
Correct your spelling
interested
 in getting to know new cultures and places.
Secondly
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, developing technologies have made flights safer and cheaper;
infact
Correct your spelling
in fact
, some
air
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 companies offer plane tickets for less than 30 euros each.
Lastly
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, world
competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
show examples
 and events attract a
lot
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 of tourists from all over the globe.
For example
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, The Eras Tour, Taylor Swift's
last
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 global tour, has caused millions of people to
travel
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 to different
continets
Correct your spelling
continents
 just to attend her concerts.
This
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 rise in
air
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 traffic has caused issues in different departments.
Firstly
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, in the environment, since the amount of emissions
have
Change the verb form
has
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 risen, worsening
air
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 quality.
Secondly
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, tourism's rate has grown, making some countries overpopulated and creating problems for the local economy.
For instance
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, Venice had to put a ban on the amount of tourists allowed to visit it all at once, since high affluence made the city heavier and at higher risk of being submerged. In conclusion, it is possible to confirm that a
lot
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 of causes are to blame for the growth that
air
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travel
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 has experienced, which has caused a
lot
Use synonyms
 of problems all over the globe

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Language
Try to ensure that spelling errors do not distract from your ideas. For instance, 'appeling' should be 'appealing', and 'intrested' should be 'interested'.
Content
Consider adding more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments, especially in the point about globalization and technological advancements.
Content
While your conclusion summarizes your points well, you might consider adding a personal opinion on whether the benefits outweigh the downsides of increased air travel.
Content
Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and provides relevant examples to support your points.
Structure
The organization of your ideas is mostly logical, leading the reader through your arguments effectively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic growth
  • Disposable income
  • Aviation technology
  • Efficient
  • Proliferation
  • Budget airlines
  • Globalization
  • Tourism
  • Social media
  • Promotional activities
  • Economic development
  • Cultural exchange
  • Environmental impact
  • Carbon emissions
  • Climate change
  • Over-tourism
  • Local resources
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