Some people think that when recruiting companies should aim to take on people who are innocent and able to work independently, while others consider, they should recruit people who are able to work in a team or follow instructions

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
According to
Linking Words
the meaning of some people, it is better to give a job to staff, who is able to work alone.
While
Linking Words
others argued that club workers are more productive.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss both views and I will give my own opinion
at the end
Linking Words
. On the one hand, by working independently employees might reduce discussions with each other
as well as
Linking Words
raise creative thinking.
Due to
Linking Words
while
Linking Words
working together in a band, when someone does not agree with their idea, it is able to make them angry.
As a consequence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
might be the reason for the dispute.
In addition
Linking Words
to
this
Linking Words
, creative thinking is increased
while
Linking Words
working alone, as they all will have their own
ideas
Use synonyms
and are allowed to share them more clearly by working individually.
Thus
Linking Words
, the competition among the employees
reduced
Add a missing verb
is reduced
show examples
and
ideas
Use synonyms
will be more diverse.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, by the team working the staff might save time and
also
Linking Words
increase productivity among workers . When employers give tasks or projects , the process will be faster and easier.
Linking Words
Due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, there were five or six people in the group and the whole attention of
this
Linking Words
person will be on one problem.
As a result
Linking Words
, it will be solved totally quickly.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, by communication, they are able to learn new skills from each other
as well as
Linking Words
change with
ideas
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, the company’s achievements will develop.
To conclude
Linking Words
, There are benefits and drawbacks on both sides.
However
Linking Words
, In my opinion, the team workers are more effective
due to
Linking Words
they can solve tasks faster by interpreting and sharing
ideas
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
The introduction could be clearer by stating the main points that will be discussed in the essay. Try to outline your argument more explicitly.
Task Response
Make sure to clarify your ideas and provide examples to support your arguments more effectively. Some points could be elaborated on for better clarity.
Coherence and Cohesion
Check for grammatical accuracy and fluency in your writing. Some sentences are unclear and contain errors that detract from the overall coherence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses clearly on a single idea and connects smoothly to the next. This will help improve the logical flow of your argument.
Task Response
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both viewpoints, which is a strong point in addressing the task.
Task Response
You make valid points about the benefits of both independent work and teamwork, showing a good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovative
  • independent
  • creative
  • problem-solving skills
  • development
  • new ideas
  • solutions
  • productivity
  • competitiveness
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
  • communication
  • consistency
  • adherence
  • policies
  • conflicts
  • efficiency
What to do next:
Look at other essays: