The use of mobile phones should be banned in public space such as libraries, transportations, and shops. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, life without smartphones is a fantasy. Prohibiting the use of phones in public domains, is indeed, a good thought but how much we can abide by it is a big question. In my view, we can restrict its

usage

Use synonyms

in public areas but abandoning it completely seems impossible. First and foremost, the advancement of technology has made us so dependent on electronic gadgets that we find it difficult to stay away from them. Mobiles are one of them. Whenever we travel, for work, leisure or study, we need our phones handy not only to track our way but

also

Linking Words

to know how much time is it going to take to reach our destination.

Thus

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it becomes a necessity for us to remain glued to our phones all the time during our journey.

Moreover

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, in public libraries, where absolute silence is observed, we still chat with our friends on WhatsApp or click pictures of the required material that we need from library books,

therefore

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, carrying a

phone

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becomes important.

Additionally

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, many boutiques, though discouraging

phone

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usage

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, are not able to ban it completely as many people pay through certain payment applications which are installed in the

phone

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. Take

for instance

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a recent example of a teenage girl, whose parents disallowed her to carry cash with her, but installed the Google Pay app on her smartphone to make purchases.

This

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facility has motivated us to keep our wallets at home.

Consequently

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, we tend to use

this

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device.

Thus

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, we cannot ignore the value of

this

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small gadget. I firmly believe we can restrict making calls over the

phone

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however

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, carrying them or using them for other various reasons should be permitted. It is undeniable that we go to public places to enjoy our lives, make connections and explore opportunities, yet we cannot intervene in someone's personal life.

For instance

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, in libraries, talking on a mobile should be penalised.

This

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has been observed by many public libraries across the globe particularly in France where a fine of 10 euros is levied if caught speaking to someone on a mobile

phone

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in the library. In conclusion, in

this

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democratic era, we can only limit the

usage

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of smartphones in open public spaces,

however

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banning the

usage

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entirely is far beyond reality. I agree with the multipurpose uses of mobiles,

thus

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a complete ban on them will be in vain.

PriyankaTue Apr 08 2025

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task achievement

The introduction presents a clear thesis statement; however, it could be more straightforward in stating your position on the extent of the agreement or disagreement. Ensure to focus more on what you specifically believe and why.

coherence and cohesion

Some paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences that indicate the main idea of the paragraph. This will help guide the reader and improve the logical flow between ideas.

task achievement

While your examples are relevant and helpful, try to elaborate on them a bit more to better support your main points. Scenarios should link back to the argument you are making about the necessity or limitations of phone use in public spaces.

task achievement

The essay effectively addresses the task and presents a balanced view on the use of mobile phones in public spaces, considering both sides of the argument.

task achievement

You utilized relevant examples, such as the situation in libraries and payment apps, to support your points, making your argument more compelling.

coherence and cohesion

Your language is generally clear and appropriate for the topic, which helps convey your ideas effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

394 words

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The use of mobile phones should be banned in public space such as libraries, transportations, and shops. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In many countries, it is very easy to apply for and be given a credit card. However, this causes some people to have problems with debts they cannot pay back. Do you think the advantages of credit cards outweigh the disadvantages?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many doctors say that people in today’s world do not do enough physical exercise. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions are there to this problem?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social prblems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statements?