IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food all over the world. Do you think this is a positive ir negative development.

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In various nations today, individuals tend to go grocery shopping investing in food
gloablly
Correct your spelling
globally
. I personally believe that
this
Linking Words
 is a very beneficial outcome for many reasons.
Firstly
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, having
such
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 diversity allows an
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 advantage for everyone throughout the world. For say, buyers from The United States can benefit individuals from Saudi Arabia when they consume products made in Saudi Arabia.
Such
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 investment can boost any
countries
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 economy whether they are economically stable or not.
Moreover
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,
this
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 accounts for the exposure
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 food from all over the world. You can walk into a supermarket and discover meals from a
country
Use synonyms
 you have never heard of, in return you go back home and research the new
country
Use synonyms
 you just learnt about.
A popularity
Remove the article
Popularity
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
ones
Correct pronoun usage
one
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 can attract
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of advantages as people will be keen to know more about it.
This
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 includes
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 their history, their heritage and simply where the
country
Use synonyms
 is located. A trending example is Buldak Korean Noodles,
they
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 gained so much attention resulting in its accessibility in almost all supermarkets globally. And now, everyone knows so much about Korea.
Finally
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,
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of pros could come along by just introducing various
food
Fix the agreement mistake
foods
show examples
 in a given market throughout the world. From benefiting the
country
Use synonyms
’s income to simply gaining popularity from it.

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task achievement
Ensure to clearly express your opinion in the introduction by summarizing both sides of the argument, even if you lean towards one. This strengthens the clarity of the response.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use linking words and phrases more effectively to show the relationship between your ideas. For instance, adding phrases like 'on the other hand' or 'moreover' can enhance flow.
task achievement
Expanding each point with more detail can help reinforce your arguments. For example, you could provide more specific examples of how this diversity has benefitted economies or cultures.
coherence and cohesion
Consider providing a more conclusive ending that reiterates your main points and succinctly wraps up your argument.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion supporting the idea of global food availability as beneficial.
task achievement
Examples are relevant, as they illustrate the impact of global food diversity on consumer awareness and cultural exchange.
coherence and cohesion
The structure generally follows a logical progression from one point to the next, addressing the topic systematically.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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