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Writing Samples
Band 4

The chart below shows the process of waste paper recycling. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the process of waste paper recycling. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The
flow-graph
Correct your spelling
flow graph
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 exhibits six steps of waste
paper
Use synonyms
 recycling, from
Use synonyms
paper
Add an article
the paper
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 collection to
production
Correct article usage
the production
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 of
new
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the new
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paper
Use synonyms
. In general, it is clear the number of processes of recycling, which involves different characters, from a single-utilizer
,
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apply
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 to specialized operators. The first step of the chain is the waste
paper
Use synonyms
 collection, from every single
buildings
Change to a singular noun
building
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,
such
Linking Words
 as homes, apartments, factories, or offices.
Secondly
Linking Words
, some operators divide
paper
Use synonyms
in
Change the preposition
into
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 two big groups – just
one
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 group can be recycled. After that, the right pieces are delivered to
Use synonyms
paper
Add an article
the paper
a paper
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 mill. Here, the most important steps take place.
At
Change the preposition
In
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 the beginning, the
paper
Use synonyms
need
Change the verb form
needs
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 to be processed, through two
passsages
Correct your spelling
passages
. Cleaning is the
first,
Linking Words
in which other materials,
for
Linking Words
example
Add the comma(s)
example,
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 ex staples, are removed
,
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apply
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while
Linking Words
 de-inking is the next
one
Use synonyms
 and it leads to
elimination
Correct article usage
the elimination
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 of inks and glues. The
last
Linking Words
Use synonyms
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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ring of the chain is the most important process. The
paper
Use synonyms
 is recycled with a specific machine, which is able to create
a
Correct article usage
apply
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usable
paper
Use synonyms
 from the
wast
Correct your spelling
waste
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Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
one
Use synonyms
.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words paper, one with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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