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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram shows how instant noodles are manufactured. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (KLL)

The diagram shows how instant noodles are manufactured. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (KLL)
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The graph indicates how fast
noodles
Use synonyms
 are produced.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are eight steps to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 process. Manufacturing
noodles
Use synonyms
requires
Change the verb form
require
show examples
 different activities like
storaging
Correct your spelling
storing
, mixing, cooking,
labelling
Correct word choice
and labelling
show examples
. In the diagram, two main places are shown: the storage
are
Correct your spelling
area
show examples
 and producing area.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are storage silos in the first step. They are useful to keep flour and protect it from different accidents. The flour which is the main ingredient of
noodles
Use synonyms
 is carried to the mixing area via the truck. With the help of water and oil flour can be mixed. The ingredient is placed
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
noodles
Use synonyms
 discs after passing through sheets and strips.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the cooking process is started
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 adding oil and drying. Our main product is ready, but it should be cupped. In
this
Linking Words
 process, vegetables and species ought to
be belonged
Change to the active voice
belong
have belonged
show examples
 to the
noodles
Use synonyms
.
Noodles
Use synonyms
 must be
labeled
Change the spelling
labelled
show examples
 and sealed in the
last
Linking Words
 part.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words noodles with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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