It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages.

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It is stated that it is crucial for individuals to step out of their comfort zone and start taking

risks

Use synonyms

, bettering both their professional and personal lives. I believe that taking

risks

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allows

people

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to grasp opportunities others can't, opening a lot of doors in both their work environment

as well as

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their day-to-day life.

Firstly

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, there is no doubt that

risks

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can account for something rather unfortunate,

however

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, not taking it at all can cost a lot of missed chances.

For instance

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, businessmen tend to always take

risks

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despite the possibility of failure. They are ready to invest in something which is not guaranteed to succeed rather than always being on the safe side.

This

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allows them to grow their company and have an accelerated source of income not just a stable one.

Moreover

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, when it comes to personal lives

people

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tend to always choose their comfort zone, rarely taking in adventures and new experiences.

Although

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, almost all successful

people

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had to take a huge step out of their comfort zone in order to achieve their goals.

This

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allows you to acknowledge new challenges and learn to overcome them. Simply, a well known

activity-skydiving

Correct your spelling

skydiving

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, is an activity a lot of

people

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fear as it involves taking a risk. What if

Change the capitalization

show examples

do not land correctly? Despite the risk, many argue that it is the best experience they have ever had in which the adrenaline rush overpowers any sense of fear. To sum it up,

risks

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can come with various drawbacks like failing at your job or even getting injured in a dangerous sport,

however

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, the merits allow you to have a life worth living, full of open doors and opportunities.

doodihamdoonSun Apr 20 2025

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task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion on the topic and supports it with relevant examples. However, you may want to elaborate on some points, especially in terms of how risks can lead to both personal and professional growth. Making connections between your examples and the main argument more explicitly could enhance clarity.

coherence and cohesion

While the essay has a logical structure overall, each paragraph could benefit from clearer topic sentences that reflect the main idea of the paragraph. This way, readers can easily follow your line of reasoning. Additionally, using more linking words and phrases can improve the flow between sentences and ideas.

task achievement

The introduction sets a strong tone by stating the importance of risk-taking and presents a clear thesis. This effectively engages readers and establishes your perspective.

task achievement

The use of real-life examples, such as businessmen taking risks and the skydiving analogy, adds depth to your points, making them relatable and impactful.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Directors and leaders of organizations are often older people. Some people say that it is better to have young people as leaders. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that the legal age at which people can marry should be at least 21. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?