An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. What are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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In recent years, there has been a rising number of people who want to enhance their physical appearance through cosmetic

surgery

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This

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results in a higher level of satisfaction regarding people’s pursuit of physical attractiveness. In my opinion, the increase in people choosing cosmetic

surgery

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is a positive development from now on.

Firstly

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, the reason why cosmetic

surgery

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has been more popular in recent years stems from

the

Correct article usage

apply

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technology. Humans now have a higher income than in the past, and

this

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will bring them a higher demand, especially regarding the definition of

beautiful

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beauty

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This

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outcome has led people to pay more attention to cosmetic

surgery

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as a way to

fulfill

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fulfil

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their growing desire for beauty;

therefore

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, a higher technology in surgical enhancement.

This

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can be seen in real life, where the upper class wants to improve their physical appearance, so they incur numerous costs for their beauty.

This

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can be known that society

is tending

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tends

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to take an eye to the outward look. Bringing a better aesthetic appeal to a person.

Secondly

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this

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development,

from

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my view, is a positive increase because nowadays there are some mental illnesses about the external look leading to an unwanted situation,

for instance

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, self-harm, bullying,... The beauty industry was created to build confidence and bring smiles who struggle with insecurities about their appearance.

On the other hand

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, cosmetic

surgery

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also

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has a downside, which is the risk of

surgery

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and the patient’s health;

however

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, at present and in the years to come, technological advancements will constantly be improved to promote general safety and protect human health

in particular

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As a result

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, these negative aspects are likely to be completely resolved. From a perspective, I can see that cosmetic

surgery

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is more friendly to everyone, and

this

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is a positive development bringing a better life for humans. Even though there are still some drawbacks to

surgery

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However

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, I am confident that these drawbacks will soon be addressed, and the risk levels will be minimized to the greatest extent possible.

kienvas263Mon Apr 21 2025

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task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples to illustrate your points more clearly, particularly regarding the benefits and risks associated with cosmetic surgery.

coherence and cohesion

Work on smoothing the transitions between points. For example, the connection between technology and the increase in procedures could be clearer.

coherence and cohesion

Reorganize the essay to ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support that idea more directly.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic, which is an important aspect of task response.

task achievement

You've addressed both the positive and negative aspects of cosmetic surgery, demonstrating an understanding of the complexity of the issue.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

334 words

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An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. What are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people prefer to spend time with their own age group while others like to spend their time with different age groups. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your neighbours have recently written to you to you about the noise from your houseflat. Write a letter to your neighbours, in your letter: - explain a reason for the noise - apologise - describe what actions will you take

More and more people are using computer and electric devices to access information. Therefore, there is no need for printed books, magazines , and newspapers extend do you agree or disagree?

You had a problem with your next-door neighbor. You have not been able to speak to the neighbor about this. Write a letter to this neighbor.

Over the last few decades, the media has promoted the image of young thin women as being ideal. What problems has this caused? What solutions can you suggest for this issue?