IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatments facility in order to protect the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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Introduction
Few
Correct article usage
A few
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 of the companies
product
Replace the word
produce
show examples
elixiers
Correct your spelling
elixirs
elixir
,
midicines
Correct your spelling
medicines
medicine
 and
material's
Change noun form
materials
show examples
 that can affect
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
environmental
Replace the word
environment
show examples
 without taking care of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cleanning
Correct your spelling
cleaning
 their
waste
Use synonyms
, many people argue government should take action against them, I strongly agree and
this
Linking Words
 essay will explain why we need to do that.
Body paragraph 1
Starting with
Correct article usage
the industrials
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industrials
Fix the agreement mistake
industrial
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 ages, when most of the
factories
Use synonyms
preduce
Correct your spelling
produced
high
Correct article usage
a high
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 amount of products. In the era of
evalotion
Correct your spelling
evaluation
evolution
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
innovation most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
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 not care about their
waste
Use synonyms
 management which
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
disasters to the planet.
Therefore
Linking Words
, When organizations
are forced
Wrong verb form
force
show examples
 some
industrial
Replace the word
industries
show examples
 to have their plan to remove their
wast
Correct your spelling
waste
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 safely, good idea to manage their
waste
Use synonyms
 wisely preventing
Correct pronoun usage
them to
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to
Change preposition
from
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leake
Correct your spelling
leaking
 any cancer materials to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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wildlife.
Body paragraph 2
Waste
Use synonyms
 treatment could be
expencieve
Correct your spelling
expensive
 to the
factories
Use synonyms
 but
saver
Correct your spelling
safer
show examples
 to the
environmental
Replace the word
environment
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, that can affect to the products to be more
expencieve
Correct your spelling
expensive
, When
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
making
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
 terms to the
factories
Use synonyms
 to manage their
waste
Use synonyms
 properly it will be better than not
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because
somtimes
Correct your spelling
sometimes
 rich people care
about
Correct quantifier usage
more about
show examples
commercial
Fix the agreement mistake
commercials
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 than
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 but they
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
 not know that can affective our live by indirect way.
Conclusion
To summarize the paragraph,
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
 should
controls
Change the verb form
control
show examples
 the
industries
Change noun form
industry's
industries'
show examples
 cities by
made
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 terms and
conditioning
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
 to them to produce and remove the
waste
Use synonyms
 in
proper
Add an article
a proper
the proper
show examples
 way, and if some
factories
Use synonyms
not
Change the verb form
do not
did not
show examples
 comply with it should be closed.

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language
Make sure to proofread your work for spelling and grammatical errors. For instance, terms like 'industrials' should be 'industrial', 'elixiers' should be 'elixirs', and 'preduce' should be 'produce'. Improving your grammar will enhance clarity.
content
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and relevant supporting details. Some points in your essay seem undersupported. Elaborate on your arguments to provide more depth, such as specific examples of companies or environmental impacts.
structure
Organize your ideas more clearly. Each paragraph should have a distinct topic sentence that relates directly to your thesis. This will help guide the reader through your arguments.
task response
You present a clear opinion that the government should take action against companies that fail to manage their waste properly, which is a critical aspect of the task.
content
You show an understanding of the importance of environmental protection and the potential impact of industrial waste, which is a relevant topic.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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