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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the percentage of a drug company’s total sales, by region, from 2002 to 2006.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage of a drug company’s total sales, by region, from 2002 to 2006.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The chart provides key information about the percentage of a
drug
Use synonyms
company
Use synonyms
's total
sales
Use synonyms
 in
America
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
Europe, and
Asia
Use synonyms
 during the period from 2002 to 2006. The graph clearly shows the
sales
Use synonyms
 in
America
Use synonyms
 in 2002
record
Wrong verb form
recorded
show examples
 the highest level than
Use synonyms
Eruope
Correct your spelling
Europe
 and
Asia
Use synonyms
. In 2003, the
sales
Use synonyms
 in
America
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
Eruope
Correct your spelling
Europe
 had the same rate at 35%, but
Asia
Use synonyms
 was below that.
However
Linking Words
, in 2004, the
drug
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company
Use synonyms
's
sales
Use synonyms
 in
Asia
Use synonyms
 became 35%, which is higher than in
America
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the data shown, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
sales
Use synonyms
 in the
drug
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 in
Asia
Use synonyms
rise
Correct subject-verb agreement
rises
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every year to reach the highest level was 40 %.
In addition
Linking Words
, in 2006
America
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
Eruope
Correct your spelling
Europe
 had the same
number
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
 at 30%. From 2002 to 2006, the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
sales
Use synonyms
 in
drug
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 in
America
Use synonyms
 and
Use synonyms
Eruope
Correct your spelling
Europe
 had
wave
Correct article usage
a wave
show examples
 in the percentage.
America
Use synonyms
start
Change the verb form
starts
show examples
 with
high
Add an article
a high
the high
show examples
number
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
end
Correct subject-verb agreement
ends
show examples
 with
lowest
Change the article
the lowest
show examples
 percentage.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words drug, company, sales, america, asia, eruope, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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