IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

An increasing number of doctors and professors are leaving their poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does it cause and what are the solutions.

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It is believed that many
doctors
Use synonyms
 and medical
care
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staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 are leaving their
hometown
Fix the agreement mistake
hometowns
show examples
 to work in better
countries
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. There will be two significant problems caused by
this
Linking Words
 matter which are their left
country
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 will lack of
health
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expertise
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 and
loss
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 of
investment
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 in
health
Use synonyms
 education.
Linking Words
Although there
Correct word choice
There
show examples
 are several solutions that might improve the challenging situations
such
Linking Words
 as
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 the
investment
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on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 medical and
health
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facilities
Use synonyms
 and
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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telemedicine and
e-learing
Correct your spelling
e-learning
 across borders.
The
Correct article usage
Health
show examples
health
Use synonyms
expertise
Use synonyms
is play
Wrong verb form
plays
show examples
significant
Add an article
a significant
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 role
to keep
Change preposition
in keeping
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 citizen in a
country
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
 and
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
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 their well-being.
With more
Change preposition
More
show examples
doctors
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 and professors leaving their
hometown
Fix the agreement mistake
hometowns
show examples
 may lead to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
health
Use synonyms
expertise
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
developing
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
while
Linking Words
 these
Use synonyms
expertise
Replace the word
experts
show examples
 pursue better opportunities in developed
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 might cause
Correct article usage
a widen
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widen
Wrong verb form
widened
show examples
 gap in
medical
Correct article usage
the medical
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 and
health
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sector
Fix the agreement mistake
sectors
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 between
develop
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
 and developing
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
. Another problem caused by it is
Use synonyms
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
show examples
 of
investment
Use synonyms
 in
health
Use synonyms
 education when
professionals
Use synonyms
 leave.
While
Linking Words
health
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
expertise
Replace the word
experts
show examples
 like professors are the
professional
Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
show examples
 who can teach the young doctor generation
left
Correct pronoun usage
who left
show examples
 the developing
country
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, there will be
less professional
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer professionals
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can
Correct pronoun usage
who can
show examples
tutoring
Wrong verb form
tutor
show examples
 the new generation
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 system which might
caused
Change the verb form
cause
be caused
show examples
Use synonyms
loss
Correct article usage
a loss
show examples
 of
investment
Use synonyms
. There are several
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions
show examples
 to
this
Linking Words
 matter like
increase
Change the verb form
increasing
show examples
 the
investment
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 medical and
health
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
 might
intrigued
Verb problem
interest
show examples
health
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
expertise
Replace the word
experts
show examples
 to
remaind
Correct your spelling
remain
 in their developing
country
Use synonyms
. Improper
Use synonyms
health
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
care
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
 and systems might become one of the reasons many
health
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professionals
Use synonyms
 leave their poorer
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
while
Linking Words
develop
Change the form of the verb
developing
show examples
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
offering
Wrong verb form
offer
show examples
 proper and better
health
Use synonyms
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
show examples
 telemedicine and
e-learing
Correct your spelling
e-learning
 across borders
also
Linking Words
 can be the solutions because
doctors
Use synonyms
 and
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 workers can stay in their motherland
while
Linking Words
pursue
Change the verb form
pursuing
show examples
 their interest in foreign aid. With e-learning,
professionals
Use synonyms
 can help their developing home
country
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while
Linking Words
enrich
Change the verb form
enriching
show examples
 their knowledge from
develop
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
 which even
widen
Correct subject-verb agreement
widens
show examples
 the opportunities to learn from more than one
develop
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
Use synonyms
countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
show examples
. In conclusion,
doctors
Use synonyms
 and professors
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
leaving their developing
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 can
caused
Wrong verb form
cause
show examples
 some drawbacks
such
Linking Words
 as
widen
Wrong verb form
widening
show examples
 the gap in
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the health
show examples
health
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
care
Use synonyms
 system between
develop
Wrong verb form
developed
show examples
 and developing
countries
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
health
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
care
Use synonyms
expertise
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 matter might
caused
Change the verb form
cause
be caused
show examples
Use synonyms
loss
Correct article usage
a loss
show examples
 of
investment
Use synonyms
 in medical education,
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
show examples
 e-learning and telemedicine might be one of the solutions to make
health
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
expertise
Replace the word
experts
show examples
 stay in their developing
country
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 pursuing their interest. It is
also
Linking Words
 proven,
Correct word choice
that increase
show examples
increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
show examples
 the
investment
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 medical
facilities
Use synonyms
 might
intrigued
Change the verb form
intrigue
show examples
 the
professionals
Use synonyms
 to
remaind
Correct your spelling
remain
 in their motherland.

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coherence
Consider rephrasing and refining your ideas for greater clarity. Some sentences were complex and could benefit from simplification.
coherence
Work on ensuring that all points are clearly linked to the thesis statement, especially in the body paragraphs.
task achievement
Use specific examples to illustrate your points more vividly, which will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that you articulate solutions in more detail. Each solution should clearly connect to the problems identified earlier.
content
You present relevant issues regarding the emigration of medical professionals and its impact on developing countries.
structure
Your essay follows a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is essential for coherence.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Human capital flight
  • Developing countries
  • Developed countries
  • Healthcare system
  • Educational sector
  • Medical expertise
  • Foreign aid
  • Economic disparities
  • Professional retention
  • Work incentives
  • Infrastructure
  • Temporary migration
  • Knowledge transfer
  • Telemedicine
  • E-learning
  • Mentorship
  • International cooperation
  • Manpower
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