Some people think that it's necessary to teach foreign language for children at young ages. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many people think that
children
Use synonyms
must learn
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
Use synonyms
in small age. I
also
Linking Words
think it is
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
idea
some
Change preposition
for some
show examples
reason.
First,
Linking Words
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
is fresh
language
Use synonyms
, they will have good
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
in future.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
they can go
another
Change preposition
to another
show examples
country and talk with people, it
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
life. But some people
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
agree they say
children
Use synonyms
must learn first own
language
Use synonyms
good
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
. I think both
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
possible if
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
good
Add a missing verb
is good
show examples
and
lesson
Add an article
the lesson
show examples
is fun. In the end, I think
children
Use synonyms
should learn foreign
language
Use synonyms
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early age. It
very
Add a missing verb
is very
show examples
useful and important for
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
future and culture

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Rephrase the introduction for clarity. For example, 'Many people believe that early language learning is essential for children.'
task achievement
Make sure to elaborate more on your points, providing clear examples or reasons. You mentioned job prospects and cultural interactions, but more details would enhance your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will help the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of grammar and word choice, such as using 'they' instead of 'them' when referring to 'their culture' as a possessive pronoun.
task achievement
Your argument that early language learning is beneficial is clear and relevant.
coherence and cohesion
You present a balanced view by addressing both sides of the argument, which shows critical thinking.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: