Topic 8: Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. To what extent do you agree/disagree?

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Education is an important part of every individual's life. Without education, it becomes difficult for a person to survive in

fast-paced

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a fast-paced

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environment. Teachers should be taught different subjects thoroughly in order to make them capable of passing them rather than teaching how to cook or dress appropriately. I partially agree with the given statement which will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

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with, academic knowledge is required to clear exams in

school

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. Whatever is taught by the teacher will come in the exam.

This

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is a process of going from elementary

school

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to high

school

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then

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college. Without passing those exams, students will reach their desired goals in

Correct article usage

the partcular

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partcular

Correct your spelling

particular

field. To cite an example, every student wants to choose the best college or university after

school

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.They could get

this

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opportunity

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apply

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if they pass with

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the

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required score or sometimes go through the entrance exam. All these requirements can be met with only academic knowledge.

On the other hand

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, these days, every person is migrating to different countries or cities for better job opportunities. Living alone involves many activities , especially cooking

food

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Person

Fix the agreement mistake

People

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with few cooking skills can make a healthy and balanced diet for themselves rather than having outside

food

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Thus

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, healthy

food

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provides proper nutrients and minerals.

However

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, outside

food

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will adversely affect your health.

For instance

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, a recent survey has shown that people who know about cooking are facing fewer health-related issues as compared to those who don't know anything about cooking.

Moreover

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, dressing properly reflects your personality. Having a sense of dressing up will make your first always memorable.People with a good choice of clothes can easily impress anyone , especially at events and interviews. In conclusion, academic knowledge is important but other skills like cooking or dressing cannot be neglected. These skills are

also

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useful in later life especially when you are living alone in big cities.

bajwaraman415Thu Apr 24 2025

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Task Achievement

Your introduction clearly states your position, but it could benefit from a more detailed thesis statement outlining the key points you will discuss.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay is generally structured well, but consider adding transition phrases to improve the flow between your ideas more seamlessly.

Task Achievement

While you provide some relevant examples, including more specific or varied examples could strengthen your arguments in both body paragraphs.

Task Achievement

You effectively highlight the importance of both academic knowledge and life skills in your conclusion, showing a balanced view.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your understanding of the topic is quite clear, and you present your arguments logically, which helps the reader follow your thoughts.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

312 words

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Topic 8: Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. To what extent do you agree/disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some feel that movies and tv shows are a good way to study history despite their lack of historical accuracy at times. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fewer young people choose to work in farming. What are the reasons? Should young people be encouraged to do farming work?

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work with a company or organization. What might be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self employed?