IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part-time. Write a letter to your boss. In your letter • explain why you want to reduce your working hours • say which hours you would like to work • describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer Begin your letter as follows: Dear _______________

Dear Mr James, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to cut off my hours of
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
 as
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 want to pursue
part time
Correct your spelling
a part-time
show examples
course
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
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 Global Supply Chain Management. As of
now
Add a comma
now,
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 I am working
30hrs
Correct your spelling
30 hours
 per week in
store
Correct article usage
the store
show examples
 from Monday to Friday. The
Use synonyms
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 have enrolled are to have
4 hour
Add a hyphen
4-hour
show examples
 classes on these days followed by
assignment
Fix the agreement mistake
assignments
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
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so
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will not be able to manage both
work
Use synonyms
 and school. I will request you to reduce my hours for the upcoming four months so that
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 can finish my
course
Use synonyms
 smoothly. I would appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
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 you
can
Wrong verb form
could
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 provide me
a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
schedule where
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 can
work
Use synonyms
 weekends. I might be able to the opening on sat and
sunday
Change the capitalization
Sunday
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 from 7am to 3pm. If needed, I can
work
Use synonyms
 overtime during the holidays to handle the rush hours.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I
will
Wrong verb form
would
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also
Linking Words
 like to mention that
this
Linking Words
course
Use synonyms
 will not only benefit me in my career but
also
Linking Words
the
Change the word
my
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 at
store
Add an article
the store
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. As the
course
Use synonyms
 is
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 Supply chain management, after certification,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will be able to handle the inventory control part of
store
Add an article
the store
show examples
 more efficiently. Thank you for understanding and apologies for the
inconvinience
Correct your spelling
inconvenience
 caused. Yours faithfully, Sayoni Mukherjee

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Grammar
Ensure to use correct grammar, especially for verb forms, such as ‘I want to pursue a part-time course’ instead of ‘pursue part time course’ for improved clarity.
Structure
Make sure to structure your paragraphs clearly, dedicating each to a single idea, to enhance readability and flow.
Content
You have clearly expressed your reasons for reducing working hours and how the course benefits both you and your employer.
Tone
The letter maintains a polite and respectful tone, which is appropriate for a communication with your boss.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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