IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the total number of minutes(in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the total number of minutes(in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart compares the number of
minutes
Use synonyms
(in billions) of three different communication methods in the UK, from 1995 to 2002.
overall
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 period,
while
Linking Words
 the number of
minutes
Use synonyms
 of residential
fixed-line
Use synonyms
 calls experienced a fluctuation, the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 international calls displayed an increasing trend.
Additionally
Linking Words
, more and more residents relied on
mobiles
Fix the agreement mistake
mobile
show examples
communicating
Replace the word
communication
show examples
. In terms of
fixed-line
Use synonyms
 calls, the
minutes
Use synonyms
 of local
fixed-line
Use synonyms
 calls were noticeably higher than
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 two approaches over time, starting at 72
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 1995, with peaking at approximately 90
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 1999,
although
Linking Words
, in the next three years, the figures saw
a
Change the article
an
show examples
obviously
Change the adverb
obvious
show examples
 decline dropping to initial level at roughly 70
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 .
In contrast
Linking Words
, national and international
fixed-line
Use synonyms
 calls showed an opposite trend that
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
consistently rose from 38
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 1995 to 60
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 2002.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the number of
minutes
Use synonyms
 of using
mobiles
Fix the agreement mistake
mobile
show examples
callling
Correct your spelling
calling
 exhibited a significant increase, beginning at 3
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 1995, sharply surging to 23
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 in 2000, and
then
Linking Words
 reaching a peak of 45
billion
Use synonyms
minutes
Use synonyms
 by 2002.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words minutes, fixed-line, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • total number of minutes
  • telephone calls
  • categories
  • local – fixed line
  • national and international – fixed line
  • mobiles
  • general trend
  • yearly totals
  • significant changes
  • milestones
  • data
  • rise significantly
  • decline
  • steady increase
  • fluctuate
  • peak
  • exponential growth
  • over the period
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