Governments should focus their spending on public services rather than on the art (e.g. Music and painting). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some individuals believe that governments should focus on funding public services rather than on the arts. I firmly agree with the suggestion, as healthcare and education are essential for the well-being of society, and governments should prioritise these sectors to enhance the quality of life for citizens.

To begin

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with, spending funds on arts would help individuals to express their feelings and emotions more effectively;

however

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this

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benefit can

also

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be achieved by improving the education sector.

Moreover

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, schools and colleges should be established in remote areas to provide minority groups with quality schooling.

Additionally

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, healthcare organizations should be provided with standardized, high-quality equipment, regardless of their private ownership. Governing bodies can assist poor individuals with their medical treatments through free medical coverage. In India, poor and vulnerable people have enrolled in "Ayushman Bharat Yojna", a government initiative that provides $6000 at hospitals across the country.

Besides

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the healthcare and education sector, other public services

such

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as transportation and food should be prioritised in government spending. Enhancing transportation would reduce commuting time, enabling emergency departments

such

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as police and paramedics to reach their destinations on time.

Furthermore

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, improved transit makes travelling between cities easier and more efficient, thereby creating greater opportunities for trade. To illustrate

this

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point

further

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, the transit system has undergone massive transformations

due to

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government investment in the transportation industry, allowing people to reach Tokyo from Osaka in just three hours.

Therefore

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, I firmly believe that investing in public services should be a priority for the ministry, as it helps the nation advance in the long run by providing residents with a healthier and higher-quality life.

gurvirsingh.academicFri Apr 25 2025

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task achievement

Enhance the clarity of your arguments by more clearly linking your examples to the points you make. You can achieve this by explicitly stating how each example supports your claim about the importance of public services over the arts.

coherence and cohesion

Consider using more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will make your essay easier to follow and enhance its overall coherence.

task achievement

Your introduction clearly presents your position and main idea, setting a strong foundation for the essay.

task achievement

You provide specific examples that enhance your arguments, such as 'Ayushman Bharat Yojna' and the transformation of the transit system, demonstrating a solid understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

public services
government funding
healthcare
education
social well-being
economic growth
cultural promotion
creativity
social cohesion
balanced approach
well-rounded society
investing in the arts

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Governments should focus their spending on public services rather than on the art (e.g. Music and painting). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are some possible solutions?

Some scientists think that computers will soon become more intelligent than humans. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people keep animals in their homes. Discuss the pros and cons of owning a pet for the animals and for society.

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels are continuing to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this and what are some possible solutions.