A growing population is a big problem in many countries. Should the government provide new homes in the cities or countryside?

Nowadays, one of the widespread problems for many countries, especially big
cities
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, is the growing population and the lack of enough
homes
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. The main question is
that
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
the
cities
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or the
countryside
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are the best place for providing new
homes
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by the
government
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. To tell the truth, both places have advantages and disadvantages.
This
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essay will discuss both sides and explain my opinion. Constructing new
homes
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in the hurt of
cities
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can reduce the cost for the
government
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.
Cities
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usually have enough accommodations and amenities in advance, and the
government
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only should spend money on constructing new
homes
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. In Iran,
for instance
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, governmental officials report that building new
homes
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in big
cities
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like Tehran costs half that of construction in the
countryside
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.
However
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, some believe that developing
cities
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by building new
homes
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can cause significant problems, like traffic jams, in the near future and
cities
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usually do not have enough capacity for the new population.
On the other hand
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, building new
homes
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in the
countryside
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can address
this
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problem easier and faster. There are many empty lands in the
countryside
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for construction, one thing
that is
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not found easily in
cities
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. So governments can provide new
homes
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faster in there.
However
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, compared to
cities
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, construction in the
countryside
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is expensive. It is because of that governments should provide necessary infrastructures and accommodations like transportation systems. In conclusion, decision-making about
this
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problem completely depends on the location the
government
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want to develop. In some cases like Paris because of the lack of empty lands, notwithstanding the disadvantages of building new
homes
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in the
countryside
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, it is the only option that governments have. So it should be investigated in each case separately.

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task achievement
Consider expanding your introduction to include a clearer thesis statement that outlines your stance on the issue. This will help provide clarity to your reader from the beginning.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main point. This will help guide the reader through your arguments and improve logical flow.
task achievement
While you provided examples, try to include more specific and varied examples to strengthen your arguments. This will enhance your task achievement score by showing a deeper engagement with the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Revisit the conclusion to ensure it summarizes the main points discussed, reinforcing your argument without introducing new ideas. This will improve the effectiveness of your essay's ending.
content
You've done a good job of presenting both sides of the argument, which is key in a discussive essay. This shows your ability to consider multiple perspectives.
style
Your writing generally has a good flow, making it easy for readers to follow your points. This is important for maintaining coherence throughout the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • infrastructure
  • urban sprawl
  • amenities
  • employment opportunities
  • public transportation
  • rural landscape
  • cost of living
  • recreational space
  • community development
  • subsidies
  • tax breaks
  • sustainability
  • economic impact
  • public services
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