IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that childcare centers provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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, half of the population believes
the
Correct article usage
apply
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care
Use synonyms
 centers are the best
option
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
for caring
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care
Use synonyms
 for
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 toddlers at
young
Add an article
a young
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 age but other believes senior people in the family are the
bet
Correct your spelling
best
show examples
option
Use synonyms
.Both of them have pros and cons. My views and
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
 on
this
Linking Words
 topic
is
Change the verb form
are
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 discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
 there is an increasing trend of childcare centres in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.Parents who
use
Wrong verb form
used
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 to work and are unable to take
care
Use synonyms
 of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 children
uses
Change the verb form
use
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this
Linking Words
 facility
ofently
Correct your spelling
openly
.
Although
Linking Words
,
care
Use synonyms
 centers are developed to help
working class
Add a hyphen
working-class
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 people who are unable to spend
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 time with
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 toddlers
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
Linking Words
on
Change preposition
apply
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the other hand they are is a problem
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 proper
care
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.To elaborate,in one
carecentre
Correct your spelling
care centre
 there are more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 twenty younger
kids
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 and as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to the
kids
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 there are
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
Use synonyms
care takers
Correct your spelling
caretakers
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.
As a result
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, they are unable to take
care
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 properly and are unable to teach them moral values.
Further
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,lack of proper facilities,
For example
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 , workers working in these centres are
someties
Correct your spelling
somewhat
 lazy and
do nt
Correct your spelling
don't
 take proper
care
Use synonyms
 of the
kids
Use synonyms
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
 giving them poor quality food,
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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 not
ensuring
Change the verb form
ensure
show examples
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
 proper sanitation which will hamper the growth of the young kid.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , family members are
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
relaible
Correct your spelling
reliable
option
Use synonyms
. Certainly, grandparents love
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 grandchildren and are emotionally connected with them.
As a result
Linking Words
, they took
care
Use synonyms
 of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 young
kida
Correct your spelling
kids
 in a better and
help
Wrong verb form
helped
show examples
 them to learn moral and basic values in life.Moving ahead, there is more privacy and grandparents are more focused on
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
kids
Use synonyms
 as in homes ,
generally
Add a comma
generally,
show examples
 there are one or two
kids
Use synonyms
 in an average house.
As a result
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 , family members are more concentrated
regard
Replace the word
regarding
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 the
Use synonyms
care taking
Correct your spelling
caretaking
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 task.
To conclude
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,I would like to say that family members are the best
option
Use synonyms
 when it comes to
upbringing
Add an article
the upbringing
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 of
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 child because they are more emotionally
conncetd
Correct your spelling
connected
connect
 with
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 young ones and
give
Verb problem
do
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 best to teach them
advise
Correct word choice
and advise
show examples
 them as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to the
care
Use synonyms
 centres
wherethe
Correct your spelling
where the
 population of
kids
Use synonyms
 is higher and the amount of time given to a single kid is limited which effectes the growth of the children.

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grammar
Improve sentence structure and correct grammatical errors to enhance clarity.
content
Provide clearer examples and explanations to support your points.
coherence
Organize your ideas more logically, ensuring each paragraph has a clear focus.
content
You present both sides of the argument, which is important for discussion essays.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • structured environment
  • curriculum
  • basic literacy and numeracy skills
  • developmental support
  • socialization
  • interpersonal skills
  • regulation standards
  • emotional support
  • bonding
  • family values
  • cultural traditions
  • sense of identity
  • flexible
  • cost-effective
  • nurturing
  • hybrid approach
  • balanced experience
  • professional education
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