IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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There is no doubt that
change
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 is an important part of life.
However
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, some
people
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 prefer to spend their lives doing the same activities and avoiding any kind of
change
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,
while
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 others believe that
change
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 is essential for growth and improvement. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both views and explain my opinion. On the one hand, many individuals feel more comfortable sticking to the same routine. They believe that doing familiar things gives them a sense of security and stability.
For example
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, someone who
works
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has worked
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 in the same job for many years may feel confident and safe because they know what to expect every day.
In addition
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, avoiding
change
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 reduces the risk of failure or disappointment.
In other words
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,
people
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 who resist
change
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 often prefer a predictable and steady lifestyle, where they can control most aspects of their lives.
On the other hand
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, there are
people
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 who see
change
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 as a positive force that brings new opportunities and experiences. They argue that without
change
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, individuals cannot grow, learn, or achieve new goals.
For instance
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, moving to a new city or starting a new career can be challenging, but it can
also
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 lead to personal development and success.
Furthermore
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, embracing
change
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 helps
people
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 adapt to the modern world, which is constantly evolving in terms of technology, society, and the economy. In conclusion,
although
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 staying in a comfortable routine can make life easier for some
people
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, I strongly believe that
change
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 is important and necessary. It helps individuals to improve themselves, discover new possibilities, and live more fulfilling lives.
Therefore
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,
people
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 should not fear
change
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 but rather see it as a chance to grow and move forward.

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Task Achievement
While your argument is clear, consider providing more specific examples or anecdotes to enhance your points further.
Coherence and Cohesion
You could improve the flow between some ideas by using more transition words to guide the reader from one point to the next.
Coherence and Cohesion
In your conclusion, you might reiterate key points more vividly to leave a stronger impression on the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which helps with readability.
Task Achievement
You presented balanced arguments for both views before stating your opinion, demonstrating a good understanding of the prompt.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
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