In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing.what are the reasons of this? And suggest some solutions to tackle this problem

Every individual should know

history

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the history

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behind their religion. It will not solely make them knowledgeable but

let

Verb problem

also make

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coming generations aware

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apply

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. In

few

Correct article usage

a few

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countries, past activities and events are very rare to see among individuals. The reasons behind giving less importance to traditional festivals and

Correct article usage

the elobarate

show examples

elobarate

Correct your spelling

elaborate

deliberate

actions required to tackle

this

Linking Words

issue will be explained in subsequent paragraphs. There are numerous reasons behind the disappearance of traditional festivals and celebrations.

Due to

Linking Words

constant

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the constant

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influence of social media, people are adopting more

western

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Western

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culture.

This

Linking Words

will ultimately

made

Change the verb form

make

be made

show examples

Add an article

the western

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western

Capitalize word

Western

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market more dominant than

other

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others

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For instance

Linking Words

, these days , people are following celebrities through

instagram

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Instagram

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facebook

Capitalize word

Facebook

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and many more

site

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sites

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Hence

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, they get influenced by their lifestyle and try to copy them.

Moreover

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, competitiveness in the market leads to more workload. Unfortunately, individuals will hardly get time to celebrate special occasions with their grandparents.

As a result

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will

distant

Replace the word

distance

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them from their roots. People can bind themselves with their culture

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show examples

mutliple

Correct your spelling

multiple

ways with the help of government. Authorities can come up with policies like providing public holidays.

For instance

Linking Words

, Diwali,

holi

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Holi

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dusherra

Correct word choice

and dusherra

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are the most famous festivals in India. Public holidays on these days

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apply

show examples

provides

Correct subject-verb agreement

provide

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an opportunity

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for

show examples

an individual to enjoy with family without any worry of work.

Moreover

Linking Words

, government can allocate funds to different

region

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regions

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of the country. Through

this

Linking Words

, residents of each area can organize festival fairs in order to engage themselves in past events.

To conclude

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, every individual needs to take responsibility to keep themselves in touch with their values . It passes through generations .

However

Linking Words

, government assistance is

also

Linking Words

required to make a change

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show examples

whole

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the whole

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society.

bajwaraman415Tue Apr 29 2025

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task achievement

Provide more detail and elaboration on the reasons for the disappearance of traditional festivals. This will enhance your argument and show a deeper understanding of the topic.

coherence and cohesion

Use clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your points. This will improve the overall logical structure of your essay.

coherence and cohesion

Check for small grammatical errors and punctuation, such as spacing, which can detract from the professionalism of your essay. For example, 'instagram, facebook' should be 'Instagram, Facebook'.

structure

You have presented a clear introduction and conclusion, which are essential components of an academic essay.

content

Your ideas regarding government involvement in promoting cultural festivals are relevant and demonstrate critical thinking.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have disappeared or are disappearing.what are the reasons of this? And suggest some solutions to tackle this problem

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, it is becoming increasingly common for people to do their work from home rather than going into their place of work. What reasons are there for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

nuclear power is far too dangerous; therefore, countries should ban its use and concentrate instead on developing alternative sources such as hydroelectric power and solar energy. To what extent do you agree?