University students should pay the full cost for their own study because a university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is a common belief that a
university
Use synonyms
education benefits individuals rather than society.
However
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, I firmly believe that society receives advantages from
university
Use synonyms
education so the government should pay part of the full cost. In
this
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essay, I am going to talk about the reason why I disagree with the argument. First of all, the individuals' wealth helps the economy of a country.
Additionally
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, the rich render the
enrich
Wrong verb form
enriched
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country since active money flow leads to a more dynamic economy.
For example
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, more tax provides high-quality welfare. Plus, vibrant economic activities make the middle class enrich and strong. On top of that, In my opinion, talented people
makes
Change the verb form
make
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a stable country so the government recommend students study at a
university
Use synonyms
. To be specific, public service workers will increase if there are more
university
Use synonyms
graduates people.
Also
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, civic awareness will
upgrade
Wrong verb form
be upgraded
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.
For example
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,
educated
Add an article
an educated
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person will do productive work
instead
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of being homeless or a drug user. I saw a television program which is about a Korean-style high school in the U.S.
leads
Correct pronoun usage
that leads
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children who have bad backgrounds to Ivy
league
Capitalize word
League
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universities.
To sum up
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, a
university
Use synonyms
education contributes to the economy and the public service. For these reasons, I think the government needs to pay a part of the cost.

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task achievement
Consider developing your arguments further to provide a clearer and more comprehensive response to the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your ideas flow logically from one to another to improve coherence; this includes smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Use more specific examples and detail to support your points, which will enhance the clarity and relevance of your arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion that is consistent throughout.
task achievement
There are some relevant examples provided, which help to support the arguments made.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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