The chart below contains information provided by Australia's tertiary institutions about the percentage of male and female students who enrolled in different subjects in 1995.

The bar chart, which has been provided below, demonstrates details regarding eight different subjects in Australia in 1995 for both female and male

students

Use synonyms

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be observed from the results that, except

institutions

Change preposition

in institutions

show examples

of computer, math and sciences, accounting and economics, and engineering studies,

females

Use synonyms

performed greater attendance

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show examples

other fields than male

students

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. Looking at the data more closely,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

art and humanities class maintained its popularity among

females

Use synonyms

with approximately 18%,

while

Linking Words

males had just about 13%.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, in the health course,

females

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

showed more attention than men, with 15% and 4%, respectively. In business studies, both genders had almost the same percentages, nearly 10 to 15%, with a greater number of males in the classes.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, in engineering, the gap between the genders

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

increased, with 18% of male

students

Use synonyms

and just 2% of

females

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Besides

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

also

Rephrase

apply

show examples

computing has more male

students

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, with 10% and less than 5% female

students

Use synonyms

was

prefered

Correct your spelling

preferred

among the other institutions. In conclusion, it can be pointed out that

while

Linking Words

females

Use synonyms

attended almost all tertiary courses, males maintained greater performance in

such

Linking Words

classes than

females

Use synonyms

in 1995, in Australia.

alarayazcTue Apr 29 2025

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, females with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "provided" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

197 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

tertiary institutions
enrolment
engineering
information technology
nursing
gender roles
societal expectations
suitability
caregiving roles
job market
business studies
gender distribution
gender inclusion policies
workplace diversity
gender stereotypes
historical trends
percentages
subjects
gender imbalance

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The chart below contains information provided by Australia's tertiary institutions about the percentage of male and female students who enrolled in different subjects in 1995.

Nowdays many people choose to be self employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self employed?

Some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication. Will the benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?

in many countries government are investing in new technology to deal with the public Why is this happening? do you think it is an approriate use of government money?

Some people believe that students should be given more homework, while others think that homework interferes with their personal lives and free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.