In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In today's competitive market, many companies promote their
products
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claiming they are innovative.
Although
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I partly agree with
such
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mindset
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a mindset
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because I believe that
this
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is how companies keep consumers aware of developments,
however
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, I argue that
this
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could carry some drawbacks
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along with
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apply
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it
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apply
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.
Firstly
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, there are various
of
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apply
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reasons why businesses advocate for the novelty of their
products
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.
This
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allows them to be different from other competitors and easily stand out.
For example
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,
industries
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in industries
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like technology, where
products
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are rather
similiar
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similar
to one another, presenting something as new can capture
consumers
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consumers'
consumer's
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attention.
For instance
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, Apple hosts an event annually for launching a new gadget,
where
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which
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hundreds of people attend.
This
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results in thousands of eager buyers who want to purchase the latest product.
Consequently
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, the unnecessary push of purchasing new devices constantly results in various issues. One of which, many people tend to replace their older devices even if they are perfectly functional, leading to financial waste.
Moreover
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,
this
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overconsumption leads to environmental issues, as the older
products
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usually end up in landfills and are difficult to recycle. In a nutshell, advertising can be very beneficial for companies as it allows them to be competitive and drive technological advances, yet if
such
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promotions were not regulated
this
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can lead to financial losses
as well as
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environmental damage.

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task achievement
Your introduction presents a clear viewpoint, but it could benefit from a more concise thesis statement that outlines both sides of your argument. Try to be clearer about your position on whether you perceive the development as mainly positive or negative.
coherence and cohesion
In your body paragraphs, ensure that the transitions between sentences and ideas flow well. Adding linking words and phrases can enhance the flow and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Consider providing a stronger conclusion that summarizes your main points and clearly states your overall opinion. A concluding sentence that reinforces your stance can leave a lasting impression.
task achievement
You present a balanced view by acknowledging the benefits of product innovation as well as its drawbacks, which shows critical thinking regarding the topic.
task achievement
Your examples, especially concerning Apple, are relevant and illustrate your points effectively, adding credibility to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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