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Band 5.5

Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices, like smartphones, tablets and laptop computers. Do the advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years, it become to access movies and games with our phones, laptops and computers at any time.
While
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 there are many advantages like
people
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 can save their
money
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, disadvantages could be
people
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 lose socialise. On the one hand, there are two main pros of
this
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 development.First of all, we can save our
money
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.How can we save?
For instance
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, when individuals start to watch or play games on mobile devices and gadgets, they do not need to go to cinemas and computer game rooms and waste their
money
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 on it. Despite
this
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, they can spend their
money
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 on other things
such
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 as education.It is not a secret that
,
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apply
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 these places have cost a lot of
money
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.
Secondly
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,
people
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 can access it at any time, so it provides flexibility.
As a result
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, they can watch films or play games in their home, office even in the street.
Thus
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, for these reasons, it has
such
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 an advantage side.
On the other hand
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,
while
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 there are many cons of
this
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 trend, the main one is that
people
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 can lose socialise with each other.How it can happen?
For example
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, when
people
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 stop to visit movie theatres, it is easy to be more isolated in themselves.Because these places are considered to gather
people
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.
Additionally
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, if
this
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 happens, the number of TV viewers decreases.It can be a big deal for TV networks.
Therefore
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, for these reasons,
this
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 trend has a negative side. In conclusion,
while
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 it has both positive and negative side.Personally, I think that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 outweigh the disadvantages as it can save
people
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's
money
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 and
the
Correct your spelling
they
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 can spend
to
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on
show examples
 other beneficial things.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas and provide more specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and improve clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas within and between paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Check for grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to enhance clarity and reduce confusion.
task achievement
You have addressed both the advantages and disadvantages of accessing films and games from mobile devices, demonstrating a balanced view.
task achievement
Your points about saving money and losing social interaction are relevant to the topic.
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