In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In many

countries

Add a comma

countries,

show examples

pupils are interested in buying a house rather than renting one. Because they have some prestige

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

among the relations, who has a great economy and I believe that it is a negative thing because they will have lots of trouble

to buy

Change the verb form

buying

show examples

home

Use synonyms

by spending a large amount on it.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, people have self-respect within the relations, because they will estimate you by the properties and assets you have. Many humans will take to the person with eligibility, did there have some value to

spoke

Change the form of the verb

speaking

show examples

with him.

For example

Linking Words

, many pupils are from mid-class families and they have a minimal number of assets, if they need to speak with a rich person, who has a huge amount in his bank, they will not obey him. If

their

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

need to buy a house, and he is from

the

Correct article usage

show examples

mid-class

Correct your spelling

middle-class

show examples

family they need to invest huge money in a

home

Use synonyms

, and for

this

Linking Words

, they depend on banks for

home

Use synonyms

loans.

Then

Linking Words

they will face lots of financial problems, which they couldn't make monthly instalments.

For instance

Linking Words

, Many people in

this

Linking Words

world depend on some type of loan, which does not come under their salary bounders and suffer to repay the bills. To avoid

this

Linking Words

type of problem, we can stay in rental homes or apartments with a peaceful life. In conclusion, mankind always likes a costly life like purchasing a

home

Use synonyms

rather than a lease because of people, who live around them with some point of view.

Then

Linking Words

it will put more pressure on the owner, who bought the house on loan.

karthickhari205000Wed May 07 2025

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coherence and cohesion

The introduction could be clearer in presenting the overall argument of the essay. Consider stating your main points and beliefs more explicitly at the beginning.

coherence and cohesion

The body paragraphs need clearer topic sentences that explicitly relate to the main question. This can help guide the reader through your arguments more effectively.

coherence and cohesion

There are some grammatical inaccuracies and awkward phrases that could be improved upon for clarity and fluidity. Proofreading for these issues would be beneficial.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples that support your points. While you have examples, they could be deeper to strengthen your arguments further.

task achievement

You have addressed the task directly by discussing the importance of home ownership and its implications.

task achievement

You present a clear opinion about the issue, which is important for the task.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In some societies the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. What are the reasons for this trend? And what possible solutions could reduce this issue?

Individuals should not be allowed to carry guns as it increases crime and violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Environment pollution is too alarming to be managed by individuals. Real change can be made at the government level. What extent do you agree or disagree?