Some people think that nations and individuals should focus on their problems because it is unable to help everyone in the world since there are so many in needs.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Society is divided into two opinion - those who believe that everyone should help
others
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and those who
firstly
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prefer to help themself. In my opinion,
overall
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people
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should support
others
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including for their own benefit, but everyone should decide how their help is extensive by themself.
This
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essay will discuss why it is so important to be empathetic, but at the same time why it is necessary to remember your own needs. “Any help is important” is the main idea of ​ volunteers and other enthusiasts. It means that even a small contribution like one dollar or helping an old lady cross a road can significantly affect
people
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.
Such
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kind of actions can not only help a person in need
,
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apply
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but
also
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to
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apply
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be a role model for
others
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. They say that by helping each other we make society better. But
on the other hand
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, good deeds can be ruinous for persons who take care. They incorrectly evaluate their own opportunities and in the
end
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end,
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they themselves need help. We have enough examples when famous humanitarians destroy their own lives.
For example
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, Mother Theresa took
careof alot
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care of a lot
of poor
people
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, but in the
last
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years of her life, she refused medical assistance relating to her disease so that she could continue to help.
Thus
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, volunteering is not supposed to be an action which spends both material and emotional resources of a person. Some
people
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believe only good deeds help the world, but
others
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say we should help ourselves primarily.
Although
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being careful of each other can improve the whole society, it is
also
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true that some
people
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can be so affected by volunteer actions that they can forget about their own needs. In conclusion, I reckon each person should help
others
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based on their critically evaluated opportunities.

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Task Achievement
While you provided a clear opinion and supported it with relevant points, consider elaborating on your arguments with more depth and specifics to enhance the overall comprehension of your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay's structure is generally logical; however, some points could be better connected to improve the flow. Try to use more transitional phrases to link your ideas and paragraphs smoothly.
Content
You express a balanced view, acknowledging both sides of the argument, which showcases critical thinking. Your conclusion also effectively summarizes your opinion.
Support
The use of relevant examples, like the reference to Mother Theresa, successfully strengthens your argument about the risks of neglecting personal needs while helping others.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • challenges
  • prioritize
  • resources
  • aid
  • sustainable development
  • global community
  • collaboration
  • support
  • individual contributions
  • capacity
  • solidarity
  • cooperation
  • international cooperation
  • policy-making
  • alleviate
  • humanitarian crisis
  • interconnected
  • shared responsibility
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