IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some educationist think that the international exchange visit to different countries for a teenager from school has benefits. To what extend do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In today's era, one of the most
benifited
Correct your spelling
beneficial
trend
Change to a plural noun
trends
show examples
 is going on for the pupils to go to
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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 as an international exchange program, and
also
Linking Words
 many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
proffessionalist
Correct your spelling
professionals
 are in favour of the idea. But, every coin has two sides there are some
demrits
Correct your spelling
demerits
also
Linking Words
 in
these trend
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this trend
these trends
show examples
. In the following
essay
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essay,
show examples
 we will discuss
the
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apply
show examples
both sides
,
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apply
show examples
 and see how
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 outweigh the
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
. On the brighter side, the student exchange program is the best way to learn about the different languages and
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
.
For instance
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, many of them
able
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are able
show examples
 to see the various
colorful
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colourful
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 flowers in spring in Japan, which are celebrated as a festival there.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, one can
also
Linking Words
 able to learn other methods in subjects like Maths, Physics,
chemistry
Correct word choice
and chemistry
show examples
, and
also
Linking Words
 the teenager
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
 to learn about different sports in the country.
For example
Linking Words
, Canada is famous for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Ice Hockey , which is a new sport for Indians to play. On the darker side, teenagers have to live on
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 own away from
the
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their
show examples
 family and friends. They are surrounded by
unknow
Correct your spelling
unknown
show examples
 teenagers and
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 can be sometimes tough for an
introvert
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introverted
show examples
 student. Because a bad circle and environment can be the reason for one to join the wrong path, which can be
downfall
Add an article
the downfall
a downfall
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 career.
For example
Linking Words
, the young generations in
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
 culture are addicted to drugs,
E-ciggrates
Correct your spelling
E-cigarettes
, and alcohol at
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
 early age, which can be bad for some of the teenagers who are not on
this
Linking Words
 path. But, with a great
mentor
Add a comma
mentor,
show examples
 anything can be treated.
Therefore
Linking Words
, even with the negative side
Add a comma
,
show examples
there are lots of benefits of
childrens
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children
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to go
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going
show examples
 to international exchange
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
show examples
 from school for
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 educational and
pratical
Correct your spelling
practical
 knowledge.

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structure
Try to use a clearer thesis statement in your introduction to clearly outline your overall argument.
language
Pay attention to spelling and grammar errors, as they can distract from your main ideas. For example, 'benifited' should be 'beneficial', and 'demrits' should be 'demerits'.
content
When presenting disadvantages, balance them with corresponding advantages to strengthen your argument and maintain clarity.
content
You provided relevant examples that help illustrate your points, particularly regarding different cultures and practices in exchange programs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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