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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the chats below shows what Anthrology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course . the table shows the salaries of the anthpologist in work after five years .

the chats below shows what Anthrology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course . the table shows the salaries of the anthpologist in work after five years .
The
given
Verb problem
apply
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pie chart detailed information
what
Change preposition
on what
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 Anthropology
students
Use synonyms
 did after graduating
their
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from their
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 course . The table compares the
Use synonyms
students
Change to a genitive case
student's
students'
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 wages in their sphere after 5 years .
Overall
Linking Words
 the majority
os
Correct your spelling
of
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students
Use synonyms
 select
the
Correct article usage
a
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full time
Add a hyphen
full-time
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 job . The budget of anthropology
students
Use synonyms
 was highest in
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 sector .
According to
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 the pie chart, 52% of Anthropology graduates were employed in full-time jobs, which is by far the largest proportion. 15% went into full-time postgraduate study, and 12% had part-time jobs. A smaller number, 8%, were doing part-time work alongside postgraduate studies, and the same percentage were unemployed. Only 5% of graduates’ destinations were unknown. The table shows salary distributions after five years of employment. Freelance consultants and those working in the government sector had similar salary patterns, with 40-50% earning over $100,000.
In contrast
Linking Words
, private company employees were less likely to earn high salaries, with only
at
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apply
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30% making over $100,000 and
at
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apply
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10% earning less than $50,000. The government sector had the highest percentage of top earners at 50%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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