some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and the homeless. Do you agree or disagree?

It is irrefutable that in

this

Linking Words

21st century population is rapidly increasing.

This

Linking Words

is causing Unemployment

as well as

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are becoming shelterless. Many folks believe

that is

Linking Words

Correct article usage

the

show examples

responsiblity

Correct your spelling

responsibility

authorities

Correct article usage

the authorities

show examples

to help these

people

Use synonyms

. I totally agree with

this

Linking Words

statement and will examine it in

Change the article

the

show examples

following essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the main reason behind these all issues is the government so it's their responsibility to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem. To elaborate, there are very less job opportunities available for freshers and for poor

people

Use synonyms

. Because of discrimination in schools, hospitals and at

Use synonyms

work

Add a comma

work,

show examples

people

Use synonyms

get

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

chances to get

work

Use synonyms

. Only authorities can tackle

this

Linking Words

by giving

work

Use synonyms

opportunities to unemployed

people

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, in

Canada

Add a comma

Canada,

show examples

percentage of unemployed workers is less than 30% and the reason behind

this

Linking Words

is that every individual is eligible to apply

any

Change preposition

for any

show examples

type of job.

This

Linking Words

is only possible when governance allows everyone to

work

Use synonyms

anywhere.

Moreover

Linking Words

, without

work

Use synonyms

and money majority of

people

Use synonyms

are becoming homeless. When human beings are unable to

fulfilled

Change the verb

fulfil

show examples

their daily needs they sell their all belonging to eat food for survival. Governance can provide them shelter which can help them to survive in difficult situations. If the government will not take care of them they have no options to survive.

For instance

Linking Words

, in India, more than 20 per cent of low-poverty families are living on roadies and

this

Linking Words

is a negative development.

Whereas

Linking Words

countries like the US,

America

Correct word choice

and America

show examples

have less than 5% of

people

Use synonyms

who are homeless and

this

Linking Words

is only possible with the help

Change preposition

show examples

the government.

To conclude

Linking Words

, authorities can solve

this

Linking Words

problem

through

Change preposition

show examples

various ways because they run countries. They are responsible for the country's development whether it is negative or positive.

Through more

Change preposition

show examples

jobs and providing them shelter can help needy

people

Use synonyms

kaursaijbirThu May 08 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

Consider using clearer topic sentences in each paragraph to better guide the reader through your arguments.

task achievement

Make sure to elaborate on your ideas with more comprehensive explanations or additional examples to strengthen your arguments.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion regarding the role of the government in supporting disadvantaged people, which is a strong foundation for your argument.

task achievement

You provided some relevant examples to illustrate your points, which adds to the overall effectiveness of your argument.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

299 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

disadvantaged
economic stability
social responsibility
vulnerable populations
resources
social programs
long-term solutions
community safety
consumer spending
societal problems

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some argue that music mainly serves as a way for individuals to reduce their stress and anxiety. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many would argue that the purpose of music is to help individuals de-stress and relax. In my opinion, although this is a key function, it is more important for music to uplift.
8
band
Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.
Some say that earning important quantities of cash as well as having fewer intervals of leisure is better than having less money with more free time. This essay will suggest that owning loads of it is necessary in order to have quality relaxation periods and having more spare time allows you to feel, overall, more relaxed.
6
band
In many countries, truancy* is a serious issue for both parents and educators. •What are the causes of truancy, and what may be the effects on the child and the wider community?
Truancy is a huge problem and threat for both parents and teachers. There could be many reasons why students like this action. However, they might do this because they don't like the lessons or teachers or have an exact and reasonable cause.
8
band
Health services are the basic necessity for a person. Private companies have make the health services quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages？
In recent years, there has been a significant increase in the number of private healthcare centres in many countries, which may be related to people's desire for longer life span. In my view, this phenomenon has more positive effects.
7
band
You had a birthday party and you were playing loud music. Your neighbour complained. Write a letter of apology explaining that it was a special occasion and that it won't happen again.
Please accept my sincere apologies for disturbing you last night. Because it was my sister's birthday party and my sister just came home from the USA. We have not met each other in two years. And my sister is very into heavy rock music, so my sister's birthday gift is a music CD, she was quite exciting to play the CD. When I noticed the music made too much noise and it was already over 10:30pm, it was too late to turn off the speakers. After that you came to my house and knocked on the door, I really felt bad.

some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and the homeless. Do you agree or disagree?

Some argue that music mainly serves as a way for individuals to reduce their stress and anxiety. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

In many countries, truancy* is a serious issue for both parents and educators. •What are the causes of truancy, and what may be the effects on the child and the wider community?

Health services are the basic necessity for a person. Private companies have make the health services quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages？

You had a birthday party and you were playing loud music. Your neighbour complained. Write a letter of apology explaining that it was a special occasion and that it won't happen again.