Some people think financial aid from international organizations is important for developing countries. Others believe that practical aid and advice is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many individuals believe that financial
aid
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from international
organizations
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it
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apply
show examples
is
an
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apply
show examples
essential for improving
countries
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while
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many individuals believe that
pratical
Correct your spelling
practical
aid
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and
give
Wrong verb form
giving
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advice is
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
path to
improve
Replace the word
improvement
show examples
. I believe that practical
aid
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is
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
essential for improving
countries
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. In
this
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essay, I will
this
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both views with examples. I believe that financial
aid
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might
has
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have
show examples
awful factors to prevent
countries
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for
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from
show examples
developing. First that
countries
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lend financial
aid
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from international
organizations
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, They will not afford the benefits from lending financial
aid
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because when international
organizations
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lend
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countries
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to countries
show examples
, They will have benefits almost 10% of total financial
aid
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which means if
country
Correct article usage
a country
show examples
lends 10
millions
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million
show examples
from international
organizations
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will
returen
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return
10
millions
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million
show examples
with
benefis
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benefits
that 1 million.
Also
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, If
countries
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who lend cannot afford or pay will be consequences
such
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as international
organization
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organizations
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have
Wrong verb form
having
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power
Correct article usage
the power
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on those
countries
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to do anything and sell many things inside those
countries
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to return their money.
On the other hand
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,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
practical
aid
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have
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has
show examples
several advantages to improve
countries
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such
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as
Provide
Wrong verb form
Providing
show examples
expert teams to lay
paln
Correct your spelling
plan
to develop
countries
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,
Bulid
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Build
universities to educate people or making programs for people who graduated to
stude
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study
abroad or
working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
to gain experience and return
their
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to their
show examples
own
countries
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. In conclusion, I agree that practical
aid
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is more essential than financial
aid
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due to
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financial
aid
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
bad
Correct word choice
negative
show examples
factors
such
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as the
benenfits
Correct your spelling
benefits
of financial
aid
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and if they do not pay might have control
on
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over
show examples
those
countries
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, I talked about the advantages of practical
aid
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.

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Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction lacks clarity and proper structure. Consider revising it for better flow and organization. You could clearly state the essay's objective and briefly outline your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Some sentences are overly complex and contain grammatical errors, which can make it harder to understand your arguments. Try to simplify your sentences and check for subject-verb agreement.
Coherence and Cohesion
Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea. Ensure that each paragraph is developed with supporting details and examples to strengthen your arguments.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, illustrate how practical aid has made a difference in specific developing countries.
Coherence and Cohesion
Check your conclusion for coherence. Reiterate the main arguments clearly instead of introducing new points in the concluding remarks.
Task Achievement
You clearly express a personal opinion on the topic, which is important in such discussions.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay addresses both views, which demonstrates a balanced approach to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial aid
  • international organizations
  • developing countries
  • practical aid
  • sustainable development
  • economic growth
  • infrastructure development
  • best practices
  • governance
  • empowerment
  • temporary solutions
  • customized solutions
  • effective programs
  • real change
  • relief funding
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