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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries people are living in a "throwaway society" where things are used for a short time and thrown away. What are the causes of this and what problems does it lead to?

Introduction:- In many
countries
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countries,
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 people are living in a 'throwaway society" where
things
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 are used for
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
 time and thrown
.
Rephrase
away.
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 People have
big
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a big
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 debate about the causes and the problems which
occures
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occurs
occur
 from it. People do not
value
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 the money and they do not know the needs and wants. Causes of throwaway society:- The main cause of Throwing
things
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 when they get a new one is :they do not
value
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 the product and the person who buys it.
Parents
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 buy costly toy to their
children
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 to satisfy them, rather fulfill their requirememts. For instant (Buying mobile phone for a 5 year old
child
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 will spoil the
child
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 in the future)
Parents
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 fail to teach their
children
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 their wants and needs,
hence
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children
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 suffer when they grow up without knowing to differenciate their wants and needs.
Moreover
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 they do know to
value
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 anything because they get it from their
parents
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 rather earning from them. Problems:- In
this
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 case,I believe that
children
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 grown in
this
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 type of society, will suffer in decision making and
also
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 will not known,how to handle
things
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 on their own,
furthermore
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 they will be more dependent on their
parents
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, and their survival will become more difficult. For instant(Buying 12 year old
child
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 motocycle)
Parents
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 spoil their childs life, in future the
child
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 will not respect their
parents
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 words and
value
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 their
parents
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 money. Conclusion:- A
child
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 would develop a country soin my point of view. Throwaway
things
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 is not a good sign of development to the city or a
child
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. Both should should be restricted for its good.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly present the main points you want to address in your introduction. This will help organize your essay better.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs should be more clearly structured. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea, and you should use clear topic sentences.
task achievement
You should provide more specific examples and details to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments significantly.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and spelling mistakes, as these can detract from the clarity of your ideas. Consider proofreading your work before submission.
task achievement
You have identified relevant issues about the throwaway society and mentioned potential consequences, which shows understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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