IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Women can do everything that men can and they even do it better. They also can do many things that men cannot. But it is a fact that their work is not appreciated as much as men’s, although they have to sacrifice a lot for their family and career. It is said, A woman’s place is in the home. What do you think?

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Introduction
There is no denying the fact that more and more
people
Use synonyms
 agree with the idea
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
men
Use synonyms
 can do anything better,
While
Linking Words
 it commonly
believes
Wrong verb form
believed
show examples
 in arguments says
Use synonyms
women's
Change noun form
women
show examples
 are stronger than
Use synonyms
men's
Change noun form
men
show examples
 in everything in
this
Linking Words
 essay
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
opinions and express my opinion.
Body paragraph 1
On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, nowadays
women
Use synonyms
 right's are saved,
in addition
Linking Words
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jobs
womens
Correct your spelling
women
 one of the most
imprtant
Correct your spelling
important
thing
Change to a plural noun
things
show examples
 to stand much of jobs ,I
cnsider
Correct your spelling
consider
 that
people
Use synonyms
 how
agree
Add the particle
to agree
show examples
 with ( home is for
Use synonyms
women's
Change noun form
women
show examples
) they
almost
Add a missing verb
are almost
show examples
 in old
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
,
In other
Linking Words
words
Add the comma(s)
words,
show examples
women
Use synonyms
's now can do everything in the same level of
men
Use synonyms
's they
also
Linking Words
 can do it from the bast but society standards was judged on them.
Body paragraph 2
On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, the biggest mistake
people
Use synonyms
had
Verb problem
make
show examples
 that
cut
Replace the word
cutting
show examples
of
Change preposition
off
show examples
Correct article usage
the humans
show examples
humans
Fix the agreement mistake
human
show examples
 brain and
published
Wrong verb form
publishing
show examples
 unfair ideas
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
Use synonyms
women's
Change noun form
women
show examples
 and
also
Linking Words
Use synonyms
men's
Change noun form
men
show examples
 sometimes,
Linking Words
However
Add the comma(s)
However,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 support
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 in general and stand with everyone, There is a study published by
New
Correct article usage
the New
show examples
 York
universty
Correct your spelling
university
 in 2008 conclude that 100
persent
Correct your spelling
per cent
 of
people
Use synonyms
 can achieve in the same level if
thay
Correct your spelling
they
 get the same support.
Conclusion
In conclusion, there is no easy answer
th
Correct your spelling
to
this
Linking Words
 question,On balance,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 stand behind the study of New York
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
.

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introduction
Ensure that you have a clear introduction that outlines the main points you will discuss. Avoid using informal phrases and ensure your thesis statement is strong and concise.
coherence
Improve the logical flow of your ideas. Each paragraph should begin with a clear topic sentence that relates directly to your thesis. Use transitional phrases to connect your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your arguments. This helps to clarify your points and makes your essay more persuasive.
language
Pay attention to grammar and spelling. Mistakes can detract from your message and clarity. Consider proofreading your essay before submission.
content
You have raised an important and engaging topic for discussion, which is relevant to contemporary societal issues.
content
You made an effort to address both sides of the argument, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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