IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australias share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australias share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
The provided graphs outline two different, yet related information about the figure of
japanese
Change the capitalization
Japanese
show examples
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 to abroad nations over a period of 10 years, between the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1985 to 1995. The first chart shows a bar graph
illustrates
Wrong verb form
illustrating
show examples
 the volume of
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 coming from Japan,
while
Linking Words
 the line chart shows
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Australia's data
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the Japanese sightseers market.
Overall
Linking Words
, both graphs
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 a gradual with a little fluctuation over the given period.
However
Linking Words
, the major number of Japanese
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 at the year of 1995,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nearly reaching 16
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sightseer
Fix the agreement mistake
sightseers
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
heighest
Correct your spelling
highest
 percentage of Australia's share of tourists coming from Japan was
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1993,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reaching 6
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. In the first graph, we can clearly observe the gradual increase from 1985 to 1990 followed by a slight decrease in 1991. Moving to the next year it returned to unstable increasing with a
signifcant
Correct your spelling
significant
 rose in 1995.  In the next graph, it
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
clearly
having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fluctuated
Replace the word
fluctuating
show examples
 shares. As it had a dramatic increasing till it reached 5 proportion approximately. Followed by a sharp drop
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 1
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 difference.
Then
Linking Words
 it
was continuing
Wrong verb form
continued
show examples
 to
rose
Wrong verb form
rise
show examples
 again steadily and reached its peak in 1993
by
Change preposition
at
show examples
 nearly 6
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
then
Linking Words
 had a slight drop in 1994.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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