IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that the government should pay the tuition fees for all students who want to go to university. While this may provide equal opportunities, I think it is not always a good idea because it can be expensive and unfair to others.

One reason why the government should pay
tuition
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fees
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 is that it helps
students
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 from poor families to access higher
education
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. Many talented young people cannot afford university costs, which limits their future opportunities. By providing free
education
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, governments can create a more equal society where everyone has a chance to succeed.
For example
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, countries like Germany offer free university
education
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, which helps many
students
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 graduate without debt. Government funding for university
tuition
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 can encourage more
students
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 to pursue higher
education
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. When
tuition
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fees
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 are free or low,
students
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 are less worried about financial problems and can focus better on their studies.
This
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 can lead to a more educated workforce, which benefits the whole country by increasing productivity and innovation.
However
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, some people argue that paying
tuition
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fees
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 for everyone is not practical because it can be very expensive for the government.
This
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 money could be used for other important services like healthcare or infrastructure.
In addition
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, if
education
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 is free, some
students
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 might not take their studies seriously, leading to wasted resources. In conclusion,
while
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 government-funded
tuition
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fees
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 can increase access to
education
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 and benefit society, the high costs and potential misuse make it a difficult policy to implement universally.
Therefore
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, I believe that
tuition
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fees
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 should be subsidized but not completely free for all
students
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.

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task achievement
Your introduction outlines your opinion clearly, but it could benefit from a stronger thesis statement that encapsulates the main points you will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that relates back to your thesis statement to enhance cohesion and guide the reader.
task achievement
While the examples provided are relevant, additional examples or more detailed explanations could strengthen your argument and provide clearer support for your points.
task achievement
Your argument is balanced and you address opposing viewpoints, which demonstrates critical thinking.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with distinct paragraphs for each main point, making it easy to follow the flow of your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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