Successful professional athletes can earn much more than people in other important professions, such as nurses, doctors and teacher.Someone considers it quite justified, and someone considers it unfair.To what extent tdo you agree or disagree?

Fortunate sports professionals have much more income than individuals in their essential professions, like healthcare workers and
educator
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educators
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. It is considered
quite
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quite a
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ballot by some people and professional by others. I personally believe that the income gap, in many scenarios, is unsatisfied and I will elaborate my opinion in the upcoming paragraphs. On one hand, athletes are contributing to the nation with greater energy and are provided various facilities like financial support,
luxurious
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and luxurious
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accommodations
while
Linking Words
on tournaments or other sports events.
In contrast
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to that, occupations that are the base of the ecosystem and our society are not well paid. Health Care professionals and teachers are among them. Regardless of
there
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their
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tireless
if
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apply
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efforts are long working
hours
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they are not
acupurd
Correct your spelling
accord
with the major need of today's
Era
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era, which
that is
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financial stability. At
first,
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paying attention to their offering
for educating
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to educate
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the community and
maintaining
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maintain
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the wellness of humans, one can say that they are
not
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no
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less than a foundation for a developing Nation.
For example
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, aaj school cannot work until and unless it is
a
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apply
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facilitated by teachers
similarly
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a hospital is not forced to treat patients in the absence of highly professionalised doctors and nurses.
Secondly
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, individuals in these professions 10 to work vigorously, for long working
hours
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this
Linking Words
fight having various
stressers
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stressors
stresses
in their life, they perform their daily
taskers
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tasks
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for the betterment of the group of people they are dealing with,
weather
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whether
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it
to
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apply
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be students or the critical patients on the hospital beds.
For example
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, instructors have to work not only in schools
,
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apply
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but
also
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at their home with the purpose of checking papers and preparing
syllabus
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syllabi
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. doctors and nurses have
shift
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shifted
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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for 248
hours
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regularly. In brief, the earning gap between
prothletes
Correct your spelling
pro athletes
and their professionals is
a
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apply
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demanding because the countless efforts and working
hours
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require a better salary for teachers and medical
experties
Correct your spelling
expertise
experts
.

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task achievement
Try to clarify your main opinion in the introduction and conclusion. Make sure your position is clear throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences to help guide the reader through your arguments. This can improve the overall structure of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Be cautious with grammar and word choices; for instance, 'unsatisfied' could be replaced with 'unjustified' or 'unfair', and 'acupurd' is likely a typo for 'accorded'.
task achievement
You successfully identified the core issue of the income gap between professional athletes and essential professions, which sets a good foundation for your argument.
task achievement
Your essay presents a range of examples illustrating the importance of healthcare workers and educators.
coherence and cohesion
You've made a commendable attempt to structure your essay into clear paragraphs, which is essential for coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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