IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people believe that it is better to work in the same company for their entire career, while others think it is better to change jobs frequently

Some people argue that it is best to stay loyal to one
company
Use synonyms
 rather than switch to multiple organizations. Others believe that changing workplaces helps enhance knowledge and experience. I strongly believe that it is better to change companies for career growth both have advantages and disadvantages. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss both views and provide my opinion.
Firstly
Linking Words
, staying in one place for a long time shows loyalty to the
company
Use synonyms
 and builds trust and management promotes them as a
reword
Correct your spelling
reward
show examples
.
For instance
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, in 2012 my co-worker joined the office as a customer service executive and she proved herself to be a great staff after 10 years they
pramoted
Correct your spelling
promoted
 her as supervisor and she was excited and happy about her achievement.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the staff who prefer to change their
company
Use synonyms
 more frequently they likely to be more friendly, easy to deal with and have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
positive responses to words
the
Change preposition
like the
show examples
 office environment, salary increments and career growth. Take
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 example of one of my friends who joined a multinational
company
Use synonyms
 in a sales executive position after 1 year he hopped to other places with a senior position and with
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 salary. In my opinion, staying in
anyone
Correct your spelling
any one
show examples
 place for a long time gives you stability,
loyalty
Correct word choice
and loyalty
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, when we switch the association it
brodess
Correct your spelling
broadens
 your
horozine
Correct your spelling
heroine
, more opportunities new ideas and ability think widely.

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task achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents both sides of the argument before stating your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Include a clear and well-defined conclusion that summarizes your views and the discussion presented.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your essay, making it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.
task achievement
Be cautious of spelling errors and minor grammatical mistakes, as they detract from your overall message; proofread your work for such issues.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear opinion and balances both views effectively.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples from your personal experience, enhancing the credibility of your arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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