IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

A new agenda for personality psychology in the digital age?

•I have been asked to comment on
this
Linking Words
 article about the
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
environment on
personality
Use synonyms
. I´ll
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
focus on two points: First of all, I will share my opinion about the article. • In the second place I´ll try to make a prediction about
personality
Use synonyms
 digital age •
To begin
Linking Words
, from my point of view, there is no doubt that
personality
Use synonyms
 is based on innate traits and afterwards, it is shaped by environmental factors. Let me give you an example, you could be born very stubborn, as your father was,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 education and life have softened you, making
a
Correct pronoun usage
you a
show examples
more flexible person.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, you can be innately a trusting individual,
nevertheless
Linking Words
, hard disappointments could have transformed you
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
sceptical
Correct article usage
a sceptical
show examples
 and suspicious adult. •
Lastly
Linking Words
, If I had to guess about
personality
Use synonyms
 in
digital
Add an article
the digital
a digital
show examples
 age, I foresee big changes in two directions: •In the first place, social nets will be an important factor influencing identity. In fact, social meeting places will probably be the site where most of the people will interact.
Secondly
Linking Words
, speaking about scientific research t platforms will be the biggest data source for the stu

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coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the overall structure of your essay. It’s important to clearly separate your points with distinct paragraphs. This would help with the readability and flow of your argument.
task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more specific examples or evidence to support your opinions. This will make your arguments stronger and more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Work on your grammar and sentence structure to minimize small inaccuracies. This will enhance your clarity and help convey your ideas more effectively.
task achievement
You have a clear personal viewpoint on the topic which adds depth to your writing.
coherence and cohesion
You provided two main points to discuss, showing clear intent and focus in your essay’s development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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