Some people believe that reading stories from e-book better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, many
people
Use synonyms
are showing their interest in reading stories from
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
while
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other
people
Use synonyms
believe that watching television or playing computer games are more famous for
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
. I agree with the given statement . In
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
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i
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I
show examples
show some of my supportive points which are worth considering. The first point is that
e- learning
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e-learning
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becomes
Wrong verb form
has become
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more popular in
this
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modern world. All the
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
children's
as well as
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adult
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adults
show examples
also
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shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
huge interest in listening
audio
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to audio
show examples
of stories.
For instance
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, a famous
Use synonyms
story teller
Correct your spelling
storyteller
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named
saigrace
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Saigrace
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have
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has
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been more
reowned
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renowned
in Nepal.
Whole
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The whole
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nation
respect
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respects
show examples
him and
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listens
show examples
listen
Add the preposition
listen to
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his
story
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even
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
to younger
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
.
Hence
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he
gather
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gathers
show examples
the
lesson
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lessons
show examples
of life and brings
hopeful
Replace the word
hope
show examples
by spreading
Correct article usage
the lesson
show examples
lesson
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lessons
show examples
from that certain
story
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. Spending more
time
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on video
game
Fix the agreement mistake
games
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
means unnecessarily waste of
time
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. Many
people
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act normal
on
Change preposition
by
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wasting
time
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on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching television .
However
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, other
people
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belive
Correct your spelling
believe
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that it makes our mind fresh and it help to get out of overthinking.
Hence
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if
this
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wasnot
Correct your spelling
was not
wasn't
invented
then
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i
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I
show examples
strongly
suggested
Wrong verb form
suggest
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that more
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
people
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are going
in
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through
show examples
depression.
In contrast
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, some
people
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show a
lessonable
Correct your spelling
reasonable
program to their pupils.
Likewise
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, they
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
want to waste their valuable
time
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by watching extra programs which they do not
getting
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get
show examples
any inspiration.
Moreover
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, they can gain knowledge
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
spread awareness
nd
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and
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become
more
Add an article
a more
the more
show examples
mature and respectful
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
in society. In conclusion, learning is necessary for everybody. Life is full of ups and
down
Replace the word
downs
show examples
so we must be ready to handle all the problems by getting more knowledge through the internet and watching
inspiration
Replace the word
inspirational
show examples
programs. In my view,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reading
story
Use synonyms
or listening
Use synonyms
story
Fix the infinitive
to story
show examples
through audio from
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
rather
tham
Correct your spelling
than
wasting
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
playing video games.

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coherence and cohesion
The introduction could be clearer by stating your main points more explicitly. Consider outlining the reasons for your agreement in a more structured way.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct small inaccuracies in spelling and grammar, as they can distract from your overall argument.
task achievement
In your body paragraphs, try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This will help strengthen your arguments and fulfill the task requirements more effectively.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear personal opinion on the topic, which is an important aspect of task achievement.
task achievement
The attempt to compare e-books and electronic media with traditional media like TV and video games shows a good grasp of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The concluding statement effectively restates your opinion and provides a closing thought on the importance of learning.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • engagement
  • imagination
  • visualization
  • comprehension
  • independent reading
  • sedentary behavior
  • educational content
  • emotional connections
  • immersive
  • storytelling
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