Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

In recent years, there has been growing concern that

students

Use synonyms

must be taught

competitive

Change the word

competitively

show examples

school

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While

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

others claim that

cooperation

Use synonyms

and

team

Use synonyms

working are

skills

Use synonyms

that

Add a missing verb

are more

show examples

important for

Use synonyms

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

in the

future

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both

view

Change to a plural noun

views

show examples

about which

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Use synonyms

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

must

be learned

Wrong verb form

learn

show examples

school

Use synonyms

and I will give my view.

Change preposition

show examples

one

Correct article usage

the one

show examples

hand,

competitive

Replace the word

competition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

skill that

Use synonyms

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

must learn when they

Add a missing verb

are at

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

school

Use synonyms

School age

Add a hyphen

School-age

show examples

students

Use synonyms

are particularly vulnerable

with

Change preposition

show examples

competition,

for

Linking Words

instance

Add a comma

instance,

show examples

they will compete with their friends for

Correct article usage

a score`s

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score`s

Change noun form

score

show examples

exam

Fix the agreement mistake

exams

show examples

. Some

students

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sometimes do anything even

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

prohibited to get high

score

Fix the agreement mistake

scores

show examples

for example

Linking Words

searching

the

Change preposition

for the

show examples

answer on the internet or bringing notes.

Students

Use synonyms

need recognition and showing it off on

socila

Correct your spelling

social

media. Widespread

Change preposition

apply

show examples

social media

also

Linking Words

to be one of the factors that must be considered by the

school

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to develop competitive

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

. Technology

influence

Change the verb form

influences

show examples

Use synonyms

students

Change noun form

students'

student's

show examples

attitude

Fix the agreement mistake

attitudes

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and that will

give

Verb problem

have

show examples

big

Correct article usage

a big

show examples

impact

Change preposition

show examples

them in the

future

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

cooperation

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

team

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

work

Use synonyms

are

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good

skills

Use synonyms

provision

Correct article usage

a provision

show examples

for them in the

future

Use synonyms

. Those

skills

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will not come automatically,

however

Linking Words

students

Use synonyms

must be horned since they

Add a missing verb

are at

show examples

school

Use synonyms

Work

Wrong verb form

Working

show examples

together is not only

sit

Wrong verb form

sitting

show examples

side-by-side but

also

Linking Words

learn

Wrong verb form

learning

show examples

how to hear, learn how to be

confidence

Replace the word

confident

show examples

and learn how respect to others. In several

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

years,

students

Use synonyms

will be

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

community members

which

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

have

responsibility

Add an article

a responsibility

the responsibility

show examples

adopt

Correct your spelling

adapt

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

society

Change noun form

society's

show examples

cultures.

Cooperation

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

team

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

work

Use synonyms

are necessary to build

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their character. After considering two sides, I agree to develop

cooperation

Use synonyms

and

Use synonyms

team

Correct your spelling

teamwork

show examples

work

Use synonyms

for

students

Use synonyms

school

Use synonyms

. In my

oponion

Correct your spelling

opinion

, these two

skills

Use synonyms

can give benefits to

Use synonyms

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

in the

future

Use synonyms

Students

Use synonyms

can implement it in their daily

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

, both today and in the

future

Use synonyms

elfamichellia.kSun May 18 2025

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task achievement

Ensure to present clear and well-defined arguments for both sides of the discussion, and explicitly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance the logical flow of your ideas by using more diverse linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument.

task achievement

Try to provide more concrete examples to support your points, as this will help enhance the depth of your arguments.

task achievement

The essay addresses both sides of the argument, demonstrating a clear understanding of the prompt.

task achievement

You’ve attempted to provide reasoning behind your views, which is essential in an opinion essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
8
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
55
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

strive
healthy competition
real-world competition
excessive
stress
anxiety
win-at-all-costs
detrimental
character development
empathy
communication skills
group efforts
individual talents
self-reliance
independence
balanced approach
competitive learning environments
cooperative learning environments

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Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has negative effects on themselves and the society they live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The computer is widely used in education, and some people think teachers do not play important roles in the classroom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Newspapers have immense influence on people. why? Is it a positive or negative situation?

Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause and what measure can be done to address those problems?