IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Air transport is increasingly use to exported fruits and vegetables to countries where they can not be grown or out of seasons . What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

It is increasingly acknowledged a number of
countries
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 exporting
products
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such
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 as fruits or vegetables to other regions where can not be grown their any time of the year by using air transport, which can bring benefits to
countries
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 that adopted
this
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 method,
however
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, there are cons of
this
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 industry on the long term. The primary advantage of
this
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 strategy is that many
products
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 become an integral part of modern life at any time of season and in any area in the
world
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, to be specific,
for instance
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, many
countries
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such
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 as Saoudi Arabia that usage fruits that are never grown in their region by importing from another part of the
world
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 every year, which effect of the quality of their life and make it easier and enjoyable.
On the other hand
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, Saudi Arabia exports date fruit to hundreds of
countries
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 every year in date
seasone
Correct your spelling
season
, and
this
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 industry is beneficial financially and promotes cultural awareness about Saudi
products
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.
However
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, no one can deny the cons points.
Firstly
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 using air transport for exporting can lead to
consequently
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 situations
such
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 as air pollution
due to
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 the emitting gases from the plane which has a massive impact on the ozone layer depletion one the long term.
Moreover
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, another disadvantage is the economic crisis that caused
this
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 method for many poor cities that depend on local industry, to illustrate, there are a number of individuals in Africa preferring to buy from markets that bring international
products
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 because of the impact of the promoted idea about the local food as low-quality food .
To sum up
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, developing
this
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 investment in the
world
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 makes people's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 more flexible and enjoyable by exporting useful
products
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 around the
world
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.
However
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, complementing
this
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 approach causes environmental consequences and hazards to the earth in the long term.

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task achievement
Clarify your introduction by clearly stating the advantages and disadvantages of air transport for exporting fruits and vegetables. This will make your thesis statement clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow of your ideas by using appropriate linking words between sentences and paragraphs. This will enhance coherence.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or data to support your arguments, especially on the disadvantages, to strengthen your overall response.
task achievement
You highlighted both advantages and disadvantages of air transport effectively, demonstrating a balanced view of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion succinctly summarizes the discussion and reaffirms your main points, which is a positive aspect of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global market access
  • consumer choice
  • economic benefits
  • job creation
  • food preservation
  • carbon emissions
  • environmental concerns
  • global warming
  • climate change
  • cost implications
  • consumer costs
  • dependency on imports
  • supply chain disruptions
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